Monster Crap Inductee: Jeepers Creepers 2 (2003)

Monster Crap Inductee: Jeepers Creepers 2

The Real Creeper Is Behind The Camera

2003

Sometimes there are movies that you dread reviewing or in my case, inducting and it has nothing to do with the movie itself and more to do with who is behind the camera. This is one of those movies because we are dealing with Victor Salva, a director who is a protégé of Francis Ford Coppola…..and also a sexual predator.

 

The Photo That You See Is From The Sexual Offender Registry Which He Is A Lifetime Member Of
 
You see in the 80s, Victor was an up and coming director who caught the eye of one Francis Ford Coppola (director of The Godfather trilogy) after making a horror short called Something In The Basement. Coppola then gave him the money to make his first theatrical feature film in a film called Clownhouse, a horror film about boys stalked by escaped mental asylum patients dressed as clowns. It’s a film that has some pretty good reviews for it, but you probably have never seen because of what went on behind the scenes as during filming, Victor was alone with one of the underage actors and had that boy (who was 12) give him a blowjob which he recorded.
 

When his house was raided, they also found videotapes and magazines containing child pornography so this guy was pretty much caught red-handed and had to plead guilty to lewd and lascivious conduct, oral sex with a person under fourteen, and procuring a child for pornography. Sadly, this was the 80s and for some stupid reason, the courts did not hold child sex abuse as that much of an issue so Victor Salva was sentenced to 3 years in prison (he only served 15 months of that sentence) and a lifetime registration as a sexual offender.
 
But despite that, Francis Ford Coppola kept Victor Salva as his protégé (because Hollywood has a very bad history of being okay with child abusers) and he was able to make films despite protests for these actions that sadly most people (me including) didn’t know about. In 2001, Victor Salva got his biggest hit with Jeepers Creepers.
 

Jeepers Creepers was a film where a brother and sister have to deal with a monstrous killer who takes body parts of individuals and you will know he is coming is the song “Jeepers Creepers” is playing. This made good money so of course, we got a sequel and that is where we are for this movie. Unfortunately for them, the actress who played the sister who survived would not return for the sequel, but hey….they got the brother, but because he died in the movie, they couldn’t use him too much other than dream sequences.
 
For the lead, they decided to go with a veteran actor Ray Wise who you may know as Leland Palmer in the Twin Peaks series, Dr. Alec Holland in Swamp Thing (he was not in the Swamp Thing costume), and Leon Nash in Robocop. After that, a bunch of actors who did not have any real name value was added to the rest of the cast.
 
And here is a huge shocker….there is not a Monster Crap alumni in this film. So let’s just get to the induction.
 
We begin with words on the screen explaining the purpose of this creature.
 

And We Also Find Out That It Is Day 22
 
We then go to a farm where our farmer Taggart is working on the farm with his youngest son Billy Taggart.
 

Billy is putting up scarecrows as his dad is making a fence with his post puncher. He thinks someone is messing with the post puncher and blames Billy first, who says it wasn’t him and then blames his older son, Jack Taggart Jr, who also says he didn’t do it and also as well thinks Billy did it.
 

Hey, Billy Heywood From Little Big League. Guess Times Got Tough After You No Longer Were Able To Own The Minnesota Twins.
 
What none of them realize is that the third scarecrow out there is not a scarecrow at all, but instead the creature known as the Creeper hiding in plain sight.
 

The Dog Definitely Knows Something Is Up
 
Billy gets the sense the third scarecrow is weird and looks into it. He sees the scarecrow has talon like feet and definitely knows that is not a scarecrow.
 

Those Ain’t Scarecrow Feet
 
Billy makes a run for it, but pretty soon gets tackled by the Creeper. His screams are heard by his dad and Jack Jr., who see that something is wrong. Taggart gets his gun and the two chase the Creeper, who has dragging Billy along while running.
 

Probably Should Shoot The Creature With The Shotgun. I Mean, It Won’t Work, But You Don’t Know That.
 
Unfortunately for them and fortunately for the Creeper, the Creeper remembers that he has freaking wings and just flies away with Billy, presumably to Billy’s death.
 

The two are saddened by Billy’s loss and the dog is sad too. We then go to a school bus holding a men’s basketball team coming back from winning the state title.
 

One of the players named Scott “Scotty” Braddock who is not happy that he didn’t get more playing time as the team’s main star in the game despite winning the freaking state championship.
 

The rest of the team is undaunted as they put up a banner for a passing by pest exterminator with a cockroach on top of his car.
 

And We Find Out That It Is Day 23 AKA Last Day For This Creature
 
We see the three girls on the team and one of them is the girlfriend of Scotty who knows that he is upset and knows that he does not want to be bothered right now. The bus gets a flat and the coach, assistant coach, and bus driver take a look to see what caused the flat. They are disturbed to see that it is a shuriken made of bone and having a human tooth attached to it.
 

Scotty says something to another player (DeAundre “Double D” Davis) about how he sucked so bad that he may need to the one to change the tire. Double D has a perfect response.
 

The Double D We Know Would Never Do That
 
On the radio, they hear about a fire in an old church and the horrors they have founded with people being sewn to the walls and like more than 300 bodies have been found. Yeah, those are all events from the first movie which as you all know is a much better movie than the sequel. The bus driver eventually comes in and turns the radio off so she can call for a mechanic on the dispatch. We go back to the farm as Jack Jr. are looking for clues and come across a knife that looks like it was definitely made by a guy who knows what he is doing. He gives it to his grief stricken dad.
 

It somehow gets loose from his grip and destroys the screen of a lamp.

 

How Or Why This Happen? Who Knows As It Never Happens Again.
 
We then go back to the bus as some players have decided to suntan on top of the roof.
 

After getting no signal and in the middle of nowhere, the bus driver and coaches decide that they can still continue with 5 tires if they go slow. Several players have to pee and the girls nearly get caught smoking cigarettes by Coach Charlie Hanna
 

We also find out that a school newspaper writer named Izzy Bohen is rumored to be gay, which gets an awful nickname of “Izzy Or Isn’t He”. He also has scars that some people say was at a gay bar.
 

It’s 2003 So Sadly There Was Still Really Strong Bigotry Towards People Who Of That Persuasion.
 
Oh and we also see them treating the equipment manager (the guy in glasses) like shit.
 

As Someone Who Was The Equipment Manager For Both The Football And Basketball Team, This Might Shock You To Learn I Was Not Treated Horribly By The Team.
 
Everyone is made to get back on the bus as they will be traveling slow. One of the players named Kimball “Big K” Ward thinks he sees something weird (it being the wings of the Creeper) and gets scared by a bunch of birds that causes the other players to laugh at him.
 

This Guy Was Actually Written To Be Killed, But That Scene Was Never Filmed

We once again go to the farm as Taggart has decided to repurpose the post puncher into a homemade harpoon gun with special custom harpoons (the custom knife is going to be the sharp point of one of those harpoons) as he plans on hunting for the Creeper.
 
Later in the night, Scotty and his girlfriend Rhonda Truitt talk about the game and Scotty being only in the game for 12 minutes. We find that Scotty may be a bit of a bigot as far as Double D goes and definitely thinks of himself above the team, blaming his short play time on the Coach Charlie Hanna who he thinks has it in for him, even when Rhonda rightfully tells him that Hanna probably wanted everyone to play since this was the last game of the season.
 
Also on the bus, the blonde girl named Minxie Hayes has a dream about two people (Darry Jenner from the first movie and Billy Taggart) warning her about something evil that is out there.
 

She also sees something running in the fields.
 

It’s The Creeper And He’s Throwing A Shuriken
 
And if right on cue, another tire goes flat and they are definitely not able to go anywhere as a bus can’t move safely with two flat tires.
 

Coach Hanna puts out flares and tells a passing car to contact authorities so they can get a tow truck to help them get home.
 

Hey, That Is Voice Actor Bob Papenbrook And Largo Woodruff From The Funhouse.
 

The One Whose Head Was Cut Up By The Industrial Exhaust Fan After Having It Pushed In There By The Monstrous Gunther
 
As Coach Barnes and Betty the bus driver get the kids off the bus, Betty sees another shuriken has taken out this wheel as well.
 

And This One Has A Belly Button
 
Coach Hanna is putting flares on the road and while Betty and Barnes are talking, he gets taken away by the Creeper, never to be seen again.
 

This Is The Best Shot I Can Get You Because It Is Too Blurred For Anyone To See, But That Is What Happened.
 
They hear his scream and a flare falls to the ground, which leaves everyone confused. Betty decides that everyone needs to get back on the bus and she will finish with Hanna’s flares. And to no one’s shock, she gets taken too never to be seen again after all the kids gets back on the bus.
 

Ninja Creeper
 
One of the kids named Jake Spencer ends up seeing this one and everyone realizes that something is hunting them. Coach Barnes comes in and asks what the hell just happened and all Jake can muster is that she just flew away.
 

Everyone Giving Him That Look Is Brilliant
 
They wonder what is going on, but they get a clearer picture when the Creeper grabs Barnes.
 

Scotty tries to save Barnes, but the creature just takes Barnes away never to be seen again. At this point, all the kids decide that they need to shut the doors and close all the windows. The bigger issue though that there is no more adults to tell them what to do so we kind of have a Lord Of The Flies kind of situation on this bus plus knowingly having an outside threat that can just fly away with their asses and there isn’t much they can do about it.
 

Oh And Scotty Has Coach Barnes’ Blood On His Face
 
Back at the farm, Taggart is listening in to his police scanner and basically figures out that the creature is somewhere in Kissell County and they are going to head there.
 
Back on the bus, the equipment manager (named Andy “Bucky” Buck) tries on the dispatch radio to try and contact anyone, but gets no response. Meanwhile, we find out that there is a javelin on the bus. Scotty thinks they should all try and make a run for it to some farm that may be on this road. When he is told by Izzy that is a bad idea, Scotty decides to be a bigot and question Izzy’s sexuality. Double D tries to calm him down and Scotty decides to be an asshole to him and calls him bro. Double D knows by the look on Scotty’s face that he may have wanted to say a different word. Rhonda breaks it up as now it is not the time to be fighting. This all gets stopped when Minxie backs away in horror. They all go to see what she is backing away from and it is The Creeper who is at the bus door looking at them.
 

And Sniffing Like A Creep
 
He goes to the windows and sniffs as well.
 

Somehow Sticking To The Bus Sideways Like A Bug
 
The Creeper gets on top of the bus and then creepers up to the back door of the bus.
 

Who Wants To Give Me The Spider-Man Kiss?

He smiles at several of them and in probably one of the creepiest moments (especially when you consider who is directing this film) the creature looks at Double D and licks the window.
 

Yeah, Victor Salva Really Should Not Be Directing This Movie.
 
The Creeper starts shaking the bus, which scares everyone. It goes back on the roof and Minxie faints.
 

Oh No…..She Has The Vapors
 
Minxie has another dream where she is at the Taggart farm, seeing the Creeper pretend to be a scarecrow.
 

Okay….Continuity Issue As He Was Pretending To Be A Scarecrow All The Way To The Left And Now He Is Pretending To Be A Scarecrow In The Center.
 
Darry also shows up and explains that “Every 23rd Spring, for 23 Days, it gets to eat.”
 

When Minxie asks what it gets to eat, Jarry comes back with no eyes and says “Us”.
 

Minxie wakes up and explains to everyone else what she saw and basically explains the rules of this creature, also that it can smell fear in people and certain people have a certain fear smell that it likes to eat. It can also tell what parts of people that it wants to eat. Scotty is having issues believing this dream and is as much of an asshole enough to laugh at her dreams. Bucky goes back to calling on the radio for help.
 
Meanwhile, Taggart and his son come across a car that crashed into a tree and as you might have guessed, it is the car from earlier that Coach Hanna was able to flag down and attempt to tell the authorities about their situation.
 

Suffice To Say That Never Ended Up Happening As The Creeper Killed Them
 
They also end up getting the radio SOS from the bus that Bucky was sending out. Taggart asks where they are calling from and all they can tell them is they are on East 9 in Kinsell County, which is not much help as East 9 is a big street and Kinsell is a big county, but Taggart says they are on their way. Taggart also lies and says he will call the authorities to help them, but he doesn’t do that as he wants to deal with The Creeper on his own.
 
Everyone on the bus is happy with Bucky’s vigilance in getting them some help, but that doesn’t last long as The Creeper breaks through the roof and grabs Bucky.
 

The rest hold on to Bucky to keep him from getting pulled up, but The Creeper’s grip is still strong. Rhonda decides to grab the javelin and stab the creature. The first time it goes through the shoulder, but The Creeper hasn’t let go yet. But the second one goes right through the head and that causes the monster to let Bucky go.
 

Ooooh…..Nasty
 
Also instead of pulling the javelin out the long clean way, The Creeper decides to pull this thing out the quicker, but more messy way by pulling it to the side and losing part of his head.
 

The Creeper then flies up to the air and dives onto the bus, breaking all the windows from the force.
 

Izzy looks up through the hole and sees that The Creeper is sorta KOed by the whole dive.
 

With the creature out, Scotty thinks they can escape by getting the door open, but the creature’s hard landing basically made both the bus’s main door and its backdoor both jammed so they wont open. They are about to try and break the door when one of its wings falls through a slit in the ceiling.
 

Several players go under the wing and get to the front end of the bus, but Dante Belasco is not so lucky as the “shower curtain” or “toilet paper” like wing wraps him up.
 

They try to save Dante, but he gets pulled up and he loses his head.

One Of The Few Not So Great Effects In This Film
 
We then get to see The Creeper rip out its own head and regenerate a new head using Dante’s head.
 

Pretty Cool Scene
 
With its new head, The Creeper flies away again. Meanwhile, Scotty is able to get the bus’s main door open. Scotty says that it is time to make a run for it, but some people think that is a bad idea. He also says it is time to stop being polite and wants to separate people who the creature wants to eat from people that the creature doesn’t want to eat. He is specifically thinking of Jake, Bucky, and Double D. Double D is particularly upset by that notion and mentions that he saw that creature want Scotty to so he might need to can it with that kind of talk. Double D does say though that it is time to get off the bus and most get off the bus, except for Jonny.
 

Yeah, This Shithead Is Going To Stay On The Bus And Lock Everyone Else Out For Now.
 
Because he won’t let anyone in, they rest all have to run in the fields and hope The Creeper doesn’t get them. The Creeper throws another shuriken and it kills Jake.
 

It tries to go after Double D, but he trips on a rock and The Creeper barely misses him. The Creeper then throws a dagger and it pins Scotty’s arm to a tree.
 

Stick Around
 

Sgt. Zim Of Starship Troopers Approves Of This Tactic
 
Izzy, Double D and Rhonda eventually free Scotty from the tree, but as soon as they free him, The Creeper takes Scotty away, never to be seen again.
 

So Scumbag Scotty Is Dead
 
Minxie runs back onto the road where Taggart and Jake Jr. are also there in their truck. Minxie tries to warn them that it can’t be killed, but Taggart still wants to give it a shot as he shows her his man-made harpoon gun that is mounted to the truck. Meanwhile, Bucky is able to get back on the bus through one of the holes and sees that Jonny let one person in the bus.
 

He Let Chelsea Farmer In.
 
Because the creature went after Bucky, the two want Bucky out and the Creeper immediately tries to get Bucky again.
 

But once again, Bucky gets saved, but this time by Taggart who has arrived with his man made harpoon gun and is looking for revenge.
 

The Day Is Mine!!!!
 
After a short stare down, Taggart shoots it with the harpoon
 

The Creeper flies up and tries to crash the truck into the bus. Taggart, sensing this, tells his son to turn the truck so they are no longer behind the bus, which he does. The Creeper flies around like a bass caught on a fishing hook and like a fishing rod, Taggart tries to reel him in. The Creeper eventually gets free of the harpoon and throws it back at them, but nobody is hurt.
 

Jack Jr.’s Jacket Is Not So Lucky
 
Jack Jr. has to get out of his jacket just to get behind the steering wheel. They then drive away from the bus and Taggart puts in another new harpoon with reel. The Creeper tries to fly at them and Taggart shoots through the bus, which hits the Creeper on the other side.
 

The Creeper is down, but not out. The Creeper then flies up in the air and the truck has to move so it doesn’t get leveled by the falling bus.
 

The bus is cut in half because of the metal reel and both father and son have to get out of the truck before it flips.
 

Both Double D and Rhonda hear the action, but get told by Izzy that he found a working vehicle and they need to follow him to the vehicle with the big ugly bug on it.
 

This Basically Signifies That The Guy In This Car Who Passed The Bus By Way Earlier, Was Also Taken By The Creeper.
 
Izzy reveals that he knows how to hotwire the vehicle and reveals that is how he got into a fight at the bar because he was trying to steal a car. Double D asks if it was a gay bar and that is never answered. Of course, they don’t need to hotwire the car as the keys are still in the ignition. They see the Creeper flying overhead and Izzy and Rhonda get in the truck through the driver side, but sadly the passenger side door’s handle is broken so Double D can’t get inside the safe area so he has to take his luck in the wide open back of the truck. They drive while The Creeper follow and Double D has to shoot the creature with a flare gun.
 

This is only a minor inconvenience as The Creeper tries to catch up with them again, but Izzy has an idea. Izzy makes Rhonda get out of the moving truck.
 

Izzy then tells Double D to stay down and hold on as he then hits the breaks and the creature flies right throw the two windows.

 

Double D is flown right out of the truck as the truck flips.
 

Don’t Worry, Izzy Is Still Alive
 
Double D awakens although his leg is broken so he cant really get up. He starts to crawl, but is startled by a wing of The Creeper.
 

But Good News It Is A Detached Wing
 
Bad news is The Creeper is still alive, despite missing a wing and apparently an arm and a leg as well as he tries to hop towards Double D.
 

Such A Stupid Look
 
However, if you can believe it, The Creeper catches up to Double D and the two have a struggle because The Creeper wants to eat and well, Double D does not want to be eaten.
 

Double D thankfully gets saved by Taggart, who had enough time to flip the truck back over, load in a new harpoon, and shoot the damn thing to hit the creature.
 

Right Between The Eyes
 
The Creeper is still alive and Taggart, in pure rage, just stabs the creature with another man made harpoon.
 

This Actually Goes On For A Good While And Thankfully, No One Tries To Stop Him
 
Eventually, the frills you saw sometime pop out at the back of The Creeper’s head just decides to cover up his whole head.
 

Minxie then reveals that The Creeper isn’t dead, but instead….its time to feed is over and now it has to wait for another 23 Springs. Everyone looks over the creature as we then go to almost 23 years later and a new trio of teens go to the farm. A grown up Jack Jr. comes out to greet them.
 

They want to see “it” and Jack Jr. shows them the sign showing this is a Tourist Trap now for the “Bat Out Of Hell”
 

Victor Salva Actually Wanted Meat Loaf Himself To Have A Cameo In This, But Meat Loaf’s Asking Price Was Too High So You Get This Reference Of His Most Successful Album Instead.
 
Jack Jr. charges the two boys five bucks each and I guess the girl is allowed free as she never pays the five bucks. They enter the barn and get to see the Bat Out Of Hell.
 

I Guess They Reattached The Wings, Arm, And Leg Back To The Creeper
 
The three think it is obviously a fake and one of the two boys is about to touch it and an old Taggart shows up to tell them he would advise against that.
 

One of the boys asks if he expects them to believe the “Bat Out Of Hell” is real and Taggart responds that he really doesn’t care is they do or don’t. He then tells them he shot that thing 23 years ago with his man-made harpoon gun. One of the kids then asks if he is waiting for something and Taggart smiles as he says that he is.
 

Taggart: About Three More Days…Give Or Take A Day Or Two.
 
They all look at the creature while Taggart and we, the audience, know the creature is going to wake up in a few days and Taggart is more than ready for it to awaken so he can try and get his revenge once and for all. And that is the end of the movie.
 
Now before I get to aftermath and the usual stuff I get to talking about after a film is over, I feel I have to mention a certain thing that was in the first film that is never in this film. That is of course, the song Jeepers Creepers. One of the things that was good about the first film and sent an aura of foreboding was that whenever The Creeper was coming, a version of the song “Jeepers Creepers” would be playing somewhere whether it be on the radio, TV, or being whistled. This film for some reason decided that wasn’t needed and never even planned to include it. And before you say they couldn’t get the rights, Jeepers Creepers is in the public domain so it was freaking free to use. It is even more of an insult that for the trailers only, the song “Meet The Creeper” by Rob Zombie played. I guess Victor Salva I guessed cared more about shirtless underage boys being terrorized by a guy called The Creeper than a song that made the original film work.
 
So let’s now get to the aftermath and in the box office, this film made more than the original, probably because it was more promoted than the original. Unfortunately for them, it was NOT enough of a hit that the company was looking for as it would take 14 years before Jeepers Creepers 3 was released and that was only released in limited theaters and then on the SyFy Channel. Oh there is more shit to talk about with Jeepers Creepers 3, but if I’ll save that for if I ever decide to do that film.
 

And I’d Rather Not Talk About Jeepers Creepers Reborn As Somehow Without Victor Salva’s Involvement, This Film Is Worse.
 
Anyway, Victor Salva as a director continued to make a few more films, but during a bit before the release of Jeepers Creepers 3, the whole #MeToo Movement happened and to correct years and years of Hollywood looking the other way when certain people were sexual predators, Hollywood finally decided to for the most part cut that cancerous part from itself and Victor Salva (like Roman Polanski and Woody Allen) is cut off from work, although he is trying to make a comeback with something called the Old Hag Syndrome, but that is still in pre-production and I don’t know if it will ever get out of that phase.
 
Besides Ray Wise (who already was a decent character actor so he could find work easily) and Justin Long (who has been in plenty of stuff after these first two Jeepers Creepers films), most of the cast of this film is not really doing anything. Even the guy in the Creeper suit (Jonathan Breck) hasn’t done anything after Jeepers Creepers 3. Although I can’t say everyone because Eric Nenninger (who played Scotty) did recently show up in Winning Time: The Rise Of The Lakers Dynasty for 6 episodes as Keith Erickson. Shaun Fleming (who played Billy Taggart) found that he was more made for voice acting and got his biggest duel role as playing both Kim’s younger twin brothers in Kim Possible.
 

I Guess I Should Mention That 3 Years Later, Diane Delano (Who Played Bus Driver Betty) Got Punched In The Face By Nicolas Cage In The Wicker Man Remake
 

And I Know Soap Opera Fans May Get On My Ass If I Don’t Mention That Drew Tyler Bell (Who Played Jonny) Was One Of The Actors Who Played Thomas Forrester In The Bold And The Beautiful (His Run Being 363 Episodes From 2004 To 2010)
 
Unfortunately, we do a person who have passed away since Jeepers Creepers 2. Bob Papenbrook (who played Man In Station Wagon) died in 2006 at the age of 50 from a chronic lung infection.
 
Now for my final thoughts on this film and well, I never need to see this film ever again. The positives out of the way first. Ray Wise is great as Taggart, the father who wants vengeance over the death of his younger son. He definitely steals the movie every time he is on screen and you root for him. The gore and effects for the most part is very good. Now to the negatives. While you may be happy when Taggart is on-screen dealing with his tragedy and wanting to kill the Creeper, you also get bummed out when we have to go back to the people on the bus as they are either unlikable, annoying, or both. And yes, the idea of shirtless (supposedly underage) boys being stalked by a monster known as The Creeper, directed by a known convicted child molester is just uncomfortable to watch. Also a huge downgrade from the first film and considering the sequels only get worse, I’d say only watch the first Jeepers Creepers and just stay away from the others.
 

Also, Fuck Victor Salva
 
Well, it is the summer time and since he won the Fantasy Football League again, it is time for another Summer Of Bob. He actually decided to have a theme with the first and last choice for inductions which is Freddy Kruger films.
 

The Ones That Actually Have Robert Englund In Them, Not That Crappy Remake With Jackie Earl Haley
 
So the first of these choices is a film that has been on the poll a few times and might be controversial considering what the film’s hidden meaning is, although I consider it a good choice since I find plenty of problems with the film that has nothing to do with the hidden message.
 

Yep….We Are Starting With A Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy’s Revenge