Yeah.....it is time for the worst movies of the year to be posted. Unlike the Best of the Year list, this list was insanely hard to make as many of the movies sucked. But first, let's talk about the bad movies I missed (which I was thankful to do so).
* After We Collided
* Endless
* Love, Weddings, And Other Disasters
* Shortcut
* Songbird
* Survive The Night
* The Very Excellent Mr. Dundee
Meanwhile, these are the bad films that I have sadly seen, but I've seen so much worse that they dont make the list.
* Antebellum
* Artemis Fowl
* Bloodshot
* Brahms: The Boy 2
* Capone
* Corona Zombies
* Dolittle
* Dragon Quest: Your Story
* Fantasy Island
* Gretel & Hansel
* Jiu Jitsu
* John Henry
* Mortal
* The Grudge
* The New Mutants
* The Turning
* The Witches
* Underwater
Here are our dishonorable mentions.
Now for the actual list of horrible films.
Look at that who's who cast of people from the cult horror genre. Now just realize that in this film, they all sucked. This film was surprisingly also one of disgusting films I saw in 2020. None of this movie is fucking funny and plenty of the characters are derogatory to the point where I take great offense. At some point, I started to feel sorry for the actors who had to repeat this drivel and do this stupid shit like a woman having to breast feed her supposedly adult midget son or an intentionally unattractive woman who is a vegan so she eats the only vegan meal they got, which is some green slop that doesnt look appetizing one bit. This movie goes downhill every minute of the film and the only reason it is at 25 is I had to actually look back and remind myself why I hated this like I did.
This movie is nearly two and a half hours long. Let me repeat that: this film that has terrible acting and completely unlikable people (you know, you can write dialogue to make robbers likeable) who you don't want to follow, is nearly two and a half hours long. This film, based on a graphic novel, proves once again that if you want me to hate a movie more often than not, have the film have Michael Pitt in it (who I'll never forgive for being hatable in that piece of trash Funny Games remake (I haven't seen the original so I don't know if it is just as bad although both films have the same director and are shot for shot the same so I have no plans on seeing the original). The only reason it is at #24 is thanks to Sharlto Copley tries his best to save this completely dull dystopian flick.
Well, Adam Sandler did promise he would make the worst movie he can make if Uncut Gems was not nominated for any Academy Awards and of course it wasn't nominated for any Academy Awards. Unfortunately for Mr. Sandler, this isn't the worst film he has ever made although he is not exactly far off. This film has plenty of his pals in it and like always, they are all terrible people. This of course tries to make it a mystery of who is kidnapping people, but all the characters are terrible people so you have no desire to see if they live or die. Oh and of course, you always have to have the one woman who is completely attracted to Adam Sandler's character no matter how much of a dumbass his character is. Oh and the ending is typical Sandler crap as well as Sandler's dumbass character is mayor and everyone likes him now. If you are dealing with a Sandler film that is direct to Netflix, don't watch.
Shudder exclusives aren't always the best films and none proves that more than Confessional. A murder mystery that you really don't care about does not make for a good idea. Let's reveal the important spoilers here since I don't want you to waste your eyes on this. One of the people in the confessionals (the dark-haired white woman) is responsible for the whole confessional thing in the first place and killed the girl who died of an overdose as she was in love with the murdered girl, but the murders girl didn't share the feeling; the one upper class looking guy who thinks terribly of women killed the guy before he outed him a guy who convinces his proteges (including the murdered guy) to blow him; and the step-brother of a girl who was dating the murdered girl, wants to bang his step-sister and gave the drugs that were used in the overdose. If all of this sounds extremely stupid, that's because it is and oh yeah, it is boring before we get these reveals.
Oh there are three animated movies in the worst of the year list and this is one that annoyed me to no end, but the only reason it isnt the worst is one was worst animated with a dull plot and one was boring beyond belief that probably only had 10-20 scenes that we reused over and over again with new dialogue. This film is sadly part of Netflix's Representation Matters series and just because you have rappers and black celebrities voicing characters in your film, doesn't mean it will be a good film. You definitely need a script, plot, and characters that don't want you to bang your head into a wall. This film about a video game superhero's kids getting sent to the real world to be under the care of a video game player is just batshit nuts and not in the enjoyable kind, but more in the kind of this makes no fucking sense. Trust me and stay away from this film.
This is the movie that is technologically worse and wouldn't you know it, it's an animated film from the Asylum that was a ripoff of the Disney Pixar film Onward. And the problems all start with this Blu-Ray cover. That guy next to the orc fellow, yeah....his hair is wrong as he has brown hair in the film and not this spike blonde that is on the cover. You will later when watching the film realize huge visual mistakes like a kid's eye sticking out of the eyelid when he blinks or a huge problem with these Asylum animated films, moments where people are walking and their feet are aren't completely touching the ground. Homeward also has other moments like a frogperson's car leaps instead of drives. This movie is absolutely dreadful, but if you've seen these Asylum animated knockoffs, you should know that.
You are all too familiar that Bruce Willis does many movies (mostly direct to DVD ones) these days just for a paycheck and barely moves at all. Well, this is another example of that type of film so we won't really talk about Bruce's decisions in acting. Instead, we will talk about everything else that is problematic. When ex-WWE diva Eva Marie is actually decent in her acting compared to the others (including the woman you have as Bruce Willis' daughter), you have problems. The audio at times gave a really bad echo. We also have a villain named The Pardoner and have a mysterious device that may be used to kill many lives. Oh and our old pal Texas Battle is in this film and is still a bad actor. Finally, we have Jesse Metcalfe, who you couldn't convince me is a leading man in an action movie. Ultimately, it is a complete chore to finish and can be thankful that it is only #19.
I so......wanted to like this film. I mean, it's a Godzilla parody film and as a Godzilla fan, I can appreciate a good parody of the big monster and there are certain things I liked like the idea that Notzilla grows bigger with beer, the Notzilla design, and our lead douchebag having the view of everything thinking they like or love him. However, the acting in this film is completely shit and even though this film is a paltry 78 minutes, it just feels longer than it is. While I do appreciate the nods to Godzilla, I just can't help but hate this film for completely wasting my time. You may think I am being a little too mean to put this film this low and maybe I am, but again....this is my opinion on how I felt about this film.
Dear god, this film sucks. Due to mistaken identity and address, a father turns into a vampire and shenanigans ensue. He tries to keep it a secret, but does it in the worst way possible. This movie even tried to pretend it is a 50s type show so we could expect more of the cornier jokes and.....they all suck (not in the way a vampire film should suck). And there are other monsters, but they add nothing to the film. I really feel bad for the actors because it seems like they tried with the material they had, but a bad script screws anyone. There really is not much more to say about a film like this so I won't even try.
Yes, this is a direct to DVD sequel to the mediocre Adam Sandler and Damon Wayans film from 1996 and yes, this movie wants you to believe these are the same characters. However, they want you to believe that first movie was just the Hollywood version of events that happened and this is the real characters doing events afterwards. Just so you know, these two are supposed to be characters played by Adam Sandler and Daman Wayans. Neither of these two are fucking funny here and some of the events again are really disgusting. Oh and somehow they were able Tony Todd into this film. And the worst part of all of this is this film was at one point my worst film in 2020. That means that 16 films somehow found a way to be worse than this one.
Damn you, Glenn Danzig. You just had to try and make a movie. The name Verotika is basically a combination of violence and erotica (and the k instead of c because Linkara would say "Because poor literacy is kewl"). Almost every actor hired in this terrible trilogy with terrible CGI effects is a porn actress and boy is the dialogue some of the worst imaginable. The first story has some of the worst French accents I have ever seen. Then we have the second story where we are looking at a woman who is killing women and stealing their face and the detectives can't figure out who did it, despite there being a popular stripper who is obviously wearing the face of her murdered victims. The third story is the most boring and that is because it is a generic re-telling of the Elizabeth Bathory tale. This anthology is so bad and the worst part here is I own it because my friend got it for me to eventually do a future induction on it.
This is from the same director who did the honorable mention film Cry Havoc. And this film is why that film may not be on the list. This film is about a antihero character named Dragonfly who is an assassin that has been hired to kill a serial killer that is killing women and is backed by a *sigh* elite group of liberals who need to have the blood of young women to not age. Man, you rarely see a conspiracy theory in film form and boy, it has scenes you have seen from Cry Havoc and I really dont which film came first and which film used stock footage. However, this is worse than Cry Havoc in every way and the conspiracy theory bullshit and Rene Perez is close to being one of those whose films I will avoid (like someone who would be the director who made #1, but I'll get into that then).
Asylum made it onto this list again with an even more boring and more audio problemed film (seriously, the lasers in the guns don't make a sound and sometimes lasers don't even show up). Everyone in this film completely suck at the roles they are given and we just replaced Empire with Coalition (Rebels are still the same). Oh and that guy at the top, he isn't the ultimate bad guy and is in fact just a lackey to the main bad guy, a guy who looks like a business douchebag with a cape. There is other stuff in this Star Wars knockoff that is bad, but thankfully....it's too boring to remember other than what I mentioned as you may "Battle" to stay awake watching this film.
The next two movies will have to do with Ouija. This first one is about a shark that is reborn as a shark and it can basically attack anywhere (on land and in water). And I want you to notice the blood in that poster because there is really a small bit of it in the actual film. In fact, there is a scene that I laughed at where the shark comes at a woman in the pool, is about to eat her but it cuts to black, then we get the scream, chomp sounds, and a small bit of blood (I am not kidding, that happened). One of the male actors who I think is someone's dad in the film cannot be bothered to put any emotion in his lines and is completely wooden throughout the entire film. Oh and the CGI is laughable too. The only reason I didn't rank this above the other Ouija film is I laughed at this film.
This is a film where we have a completely offensive portrayal of an autistic person (who is also agoraphobic) and as someone who has a really mild case of autism, I completely hate that shit. This film has a brother taking care of this autistic person who is only interested in playing board games and somehow this girl gets her hands on a Ouija board, which brings out a bunch of spirits including a laughably stereotypical Italian accent from a guy who I definitely believe isn't Italian. Again other than the few small things, this film is completely boring and can be downright offensive. This film should just thank it stars that I didn't put it in my Top 10.
I watched this movie because I liked the trailer and the cast seemed really good....but one name that is hidden from that poster, but you see his face is the one who I should have been suspicious of this film. That name is Nick Swardson. This film is definitely a disgusting film as we see balls and shit. Everyone in this film are huge assholes (except Olivia Munn, but because she is not in the film at the end), and all of these people I think deserve all the shit they go through. Oh and this is a WWE Studios film so of course a wrestler is in it in Sheamus and while he tries in his part, it just isn't good. If you are thinking of watching the film just by looking at this poster as it seems like a fun idea, don't you believe for one second that it is, because it is not.
9. Barbie & Kendra Save The Tiger King
Remember how I mentioned that the complete film that exploited COVID-19 in Corona Zombies didn't make the list. Well, this sequel that was released a few months later is why. This film is so fucking boring, even when we get to the stock footage with different dubbing (which kind of saved Corona Zombies from making this list). The actresses who play Barbie and Kendra are more in this film including a bit where they talk to one of the guys of the Netflix Tiger King documentary in a goddamn interview (I didnt come to this to watch an interview). And after all of the wasted time that has been wasted, they just decide to say "Fuck Joe Exotic" and just move on with their day so even the title is a fucking lie.
To all the people in Star Trek that for some reason, decided to be in this film.....WHY???!!!! This is such a waste of a parody that I don't even know why they wasted so much time with this (several years it took to make this film). And they got Snoop Dogg to be in it, although considering the amount of weed that was in the film and with plants all around him, I can see how they got Snoop Dogg to be involved. They even have a puppet character like in Team America: World Police, but this character is completely wasted and doesn't make me laugh once. Like I hinted at, this film is sooooo fucking boring that I nearly fell asleep several times watching it. This almost was the last film of the year I saw, but I can thank Wolfwalkers for not leaving me with a bad taste in my mouth.
I may not know everything about Elvis, but I know a little bit about the King of Rock N' Roll and this film should be ashamed of itself for trying to say this is the actual Elvis. Graceland, Priscilla and Lisa Marie, his African-American influences....all not even mentioned or bothered with. Instead, Elvis wants to come back to Earth to see a secret daughter he never had and to compete in a Elvis impersonator contest. Oh and the effects and acting are terrible as well. And the Martin Kove starring role that they mentioned is just a fucking cameo. Fuck this film that somehow was able to get one of Elvis' friends to play himself in the film.
This is a film about Islamic terrorists going back in time.............to murder Jesus Christ. I am not fucking kidding. I normally avoid many of these religious films because as someone who isn't religious at all, I am not really into trying to review those type of movies. But I can say without a shadow of a doubt that this film is completely offensive and has not much to save it. Oh and in the ending, they somehow tease a sequel with the damn Anti-Christ. Oh and this film's name get in Heidi Montag is only in the film at the beginning and the end because through most of the film, her character is dead thanks to a car accident. And just to let you know how bad this year is......this is only #6. I found 5 films worse.
Lori Petty, Corbin Bernsen, and Judd Hirsch, were you so hard up for money that you needed to be in this film that has a script like one of your most non-sensical dreams. This is not only boring film, but it is one with so much bullshit needed to happen just to continue the story and even then, when the film is supposed to end, they add something new just so it can keep going. The usual crap is here in that the acting is bad, the special effects are bad, and the only laughs you get are from Lori Petty, who plays the most generic person who likes beer. This is one legend that is better off never told. To steal a bit from the tagline, No Eyes Will Be Spared from this film's pure boredom in the end.
This will be a test of patience that you will lose because this film is basically this, a bunch of people are on a reality show to see how long they can stay in isolation in a shitty room and then, they are kept there even though all of them are willing to lose the game to get out. Nothing is done afterwards and the film just ends with some of them killing themselves. There is no resolution or anything whatsoever. That is the entire movie for 109 minutes. Hope I saved you 109 minutes of your life. Robert Carradine is only in this movie for 10 minutes and then the rest of this movie is people complaining and shitting into bucket. Don't waste a second watching this.
Pro wrestling has never looked so bad than in this film that tries to be a tribute to hardcore wrestling, but completely fails. This has everything a worst movie of the year should have in horrible acting, pointless child death, a truly unresolved ending, and especially in a wrestling movie, people who are way smaller than other people bullying them even though the tall person has some killer instinct as well. Jake The Snake Roberts (who is only a voice) and Wrestling With Regret's Brian Zane (who is killed before the title of the film) are the only people who I know of that have any wrestling experience and it shows. In a wrestling movie, the biggest sin is to make me not believe these people are wrestling and that happens here. I had an issue deciding between #2 and #3 and just today, I decided that this should be #3 because ultimately, this film had some potential that wasn't killed 10 minutes n.
The WORST animated film of 2020 is really that bad. It has poor animation (Bigfoot's tongue never goes back into it's mouth, even when attempting to close), poor editing (same scenes are repeated many times but with different dialogue), poor plot issues (why the Illuminati are aliens, why several dead people like Allister Crowley and some dictator I dont remember are aliens, why Egyptian gods are somehow involved: all questions never answered), and poor pacing just leave you so pissed off by the end of this movie. Oh and no, I will not see Trump vs. The Illuminati because I have seen this film and supposedly that film is basically the same thing. Also, I've seen the Cinema Snob's review of it and that's all I care to see of this film.
And while #2 and #3 were close calls and a tough internal debate, #1 was never in doubt as I saw it and the film stayed simmering in it's shit. I give you....
What kind of bullshit is this? Who in their right mind tried to tell this tale and completely do it horribly that it basically fucks over timelines of the deaths of Nicole and Ron and the murders of the Cross Country Killer? To this director, I know you have done some good documentaries. But as far as fiction goes, you have joined Jeremy Saville as directors whose films I never want to see again. How insulting do you have to be to exploit victims of the Cross Country Killer (many of who (including Sandra Gallagher (who you went into great detail on that kill) died a year after Nicole Brown Simpson was killed)? And I am in no way talking about the movie that has Nicole drink Orange Juice after having sex with the Cross Country Killer because other than that terrible bit of ironic symbolism, because I dont need to as you all know what happened here. In this version, the Cross Country Killer killed Nicole and Ron. But the worst is the end where real footage of the gory murders is used, a unaired and mostly dead interview of OJ Simpson is used to try and have the Cross Country Killer involved, and it ends with a message to call the Domestic Abuse Hotline if you know of or have experienced domestic abuse (just as a final kick in the dick from a tasteless bit of trash). Fuck this movie and I never want to see this again.
And that is my list of the worst movies of 2020. Again, no 2021 lists because of real personal shit and now, you know what's next. You're gonna get a poll to decide what I induct after this induction of the 2020 GINO Award Winner and then the induction of the 2020 GINO Award Winner.
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