Monster
Crap Inductee: Godzilla vs. Gigan
Time
To Get Some Alien Be Gone…
1972
Well,
it is time once again to get back into the saddle with another Godzilla film
from that wacky Showa Era. Now last time we left off, we saw the birth of the
nightmare known as Minya. Well, since then two films happened before this one.
One was the film that we inducted in the fourth induction and is largely known
as the worst Godzilla film ever. The other is Godzilla vs. Hedorah (or The Smog
Monster), a film that had an environmental message and was completely a strange
experience to watch (one which I am on and off on whether I should induct it or
not). Unfortunately for the director of that film, it was a little too off the
beaten path and the producer Tomoyuki Tanaka told that guy he “ruined Godzilla”
and would never be allowed to touch Godzilla or another Toho film ever again.
And
then we get to Godzilla vs. Gigan, a film that was supposed to get back to that
true Godzilla formula. Funny enough, the original script for this film had
three monsters being the bad guys in King Ghidorah, Gigan, and Megalon, with
Megalon being taken out and given his own movie. The good guys would be
Godzilla, Anguirus, and a statue of a fictional Inca God come to life called
Majin Tuol. It also involved an alien brain and remembering Evil Brain From
Outer Space, that probably was a good idea to scratch. Then the second idea
would be a six-way monster battle with Godzilla, Anguirus, and Varan taking on
King Ghidorah, Gigan, and a monster named Mogu….and even though most of that
story was kept, both Varan and Mogu (who was never used) were cut from the
final script.
The
man in the directing chair would be Jun Fukuda (who directed past Monster Crap
inductees Godzilla vs. The Sea Monster and Son Of Godzilla) so a blast from the
past there. In the Godzilla suit would be Haruo Nakajima (who had been Godzilla
since the first film) in his last ever appearance in the costume. The guy in
the Gigan suit would be Kenpachiro Satsuma, who was Hedorah in the Smog Monster
film (just in case anyone thought the actors in that film would also be
punished for that film). As far as people not in suits go, this would actually
be a lot of people’s only time in one of these Godzilla films, except for three
of the bad guy henchmen were also in Godzilla movies before this as well.
So
with all that out of the way, let’s get into Godzilla vs. Gigan.
We
begin this film with Godzilla coming towards the camera and after a few roars,
uses his atomic breath at the camera.
And
That Brings Us To The Title Sequence And Opening Credits
We
then see stills from manga (or comics in the English translation because this
was the 70s and the idea of manga was not readily known in the Western World)
with voices and sound effects.
Ultimately
it reveals that the horror they are witnessing is from the monsters Shugura.
The
editor at this manga publication asks if the monster Shugura is going to be
see-through since he has been shown yet. Our main character Gengo Kotaka says
this is just an outline and the editor is upset that he didn’t bring him
finished work. He asks what kind of monster is Shugura and with a smile on his
face, Gengo says that he is “The Monster Of Homework”.
The
Seal On The Left Is My Reaction
Gengo
tries to explain it as he needed the monster to be something that kids hate and
what do kids hate more than homework. All good in theory, but we are talking
about monsters here and monsters are supposed to be scary so unless you are
dealing with a dumb or lazy kid, homework is more of a nuisance than something
to be truly afraid of. The editor finds it too simple minded and that kids are
more sophisticated than that. Tell that to our western audience who thinks
anything that gets the kids to shut up is good entertainment. Gengo then says
that the monster is telepathically created by kid’s hatred of homework, which
streams through space and creates Shugura. The editor tells him flat out that
the idea stinks.
Afterwards,
his partner Tomoko Tomoe tries to console Gengo about the idea not working and
tells him that they will try again somewhere else.
Of
course the next place Tomoko has in mind for him to interview is the
construction committee for the upcoming amusement park called World Children’s
Land and the Godzilla Tower. Gengo hates this idea and mutters that Tomoko is a
hard bitch. She asks him to repeat that and he refuses to do so as we learn
that his partner is a black belt in karate. We then go to the construction
zone.
And
The Godzilla Tower
At
the construction HQ, Gengo meets with Kubota, the Secretary of whole operation.
Kubota
talks about how a monster around the tower is a good idea. He says that in the
tower they are building a museum which will be the first of its kind that will
be about all of the monsters, both Western and Oriental. His main goal is for
peace though. Gengo says we already have peace and Kubota says that it is all
just a sham and his goal is for true peace. Gengo then asks what his job will
be and Kubota says that his job is help make this place better than it already
is. Gengo then says that he doesn’t think Children’s Land has enough monsters
for children to play with and offers to let them use Shugura, the Monster of
Homework and Mommargon, the Monster of Strict Mothers.
Thank
You, Seth Meyers Because I Had That Reaction As Well
Surprisingly,
Kubota actually likes the idea. Gengo then asks about Monster Island, which is
full of monsters. Kubota thinks Monster Island should be destroyed after the
World Children’s Land is finished because we will never truly have peace with
Monster Island still around. And we see loads of stock footage of the monsters
at Monster Island.
From
Top To Bottom: Godzilla, Rodan, Anguirus, Mothra (In Caterpillar Form), Gimantis
(or Kamicuras), Gorosaurus, Spiga (or Kumonga), and Minya, (or Minilla).
We
then see drawings of Shugura, the Monster of Homework, and Mommargon, the
Monster of Strict Mothers.
While
Mommargon Looks Just Passable, Shugura Looks Freaking Horrible
As
Gengo is making the designs, Tomoko arrives to congratulate him on getting the
job. Gengo says while he thinks the job is a big deal, he definitely cannot
stand Kubota and he cannot stand their whole idea of true peace. Tomoko looks
at Mommargon and realizes the similarities between her and the monster.
Yeah,
They Have The Same Color Pattern On Their Top.
Gengo
merely laughs and Tomoko calls him a cheeky pig.
The
next day, Gengo goes to work when he runs into a woman who is running out of
the building.
She
runs away, but accidentally drops something. He then bumps into Kubota and four
of his associates. They are not nice at all as they demand to know where the
lady went.
He
of course points them in the wrong direction and then picks up what was dropped
by the woman.
He
puts it in his bag as he enters the building. He then enters the office which
is on the 5th floor and meets the Chairman of the whole operation in
Fumio Sudo.
Seems
Like The Perfect Desk For A Villain
Gengo
sees a equation that Fumio is working on and asks about it. Fumio reveals that
it is to the orbit of Space Hunter M Nebula. Kubota comes in and delivers the
bad news that the woman got away. Fumio is not happy as unless they get that
tape back, they may have to alter their plans. Gengo asks about the tape and
Kubota reveals that it is a tape of which their whole plan on true world peace
is based in. Gengo thinks she is an industrial spy and Fumio says it is much
worse as she is an enemy of peace.
That
night, Gengo heads home, but is stopped by that same woman who demands to have
the tape that she dropped.
She
is being assisted by a man who has what appears to look like a gun to Gengo’s
back.
After
not finding it, they demand to know where it is and Gengo faints.
Pussy
They
are scared that they caused him to faint and the guy reveals that the thing he
had to Gengo’s back was not a gun, but corn on the cob in the tin foil.
Gengo
wakes up at his own place with the strangers and we find out that the woman’s
name is Machiko Shima and the guy’s name is Shosaku Takasugi. They apologize
and said they should have explained everything first. They also say that they are
in fact not the bad guys and that Fumio and Kubota are. Machiko explains that
her brother Takashi (a computer technician) had been working at that place and
he disappeared. Because of the way the people acted about her brother’s
disappearance, she believes they have him as a captive. Gengo explains that he
doesn’t have it as he put the tape into a pay locker. He gives them the key and
they go to get it.
Now
at Godzilla Tower, we find out that Godzilla Tower is not a museum at all and
instead the base of operations for Fumio and Kubota’s scheme. We also find out
that this is where they have been keeping Takashi.
Takeshi
says they can’t get away with this and Kubota thinks they can. Takeshi says
this is illegal detention (basically a kidnapping). Kubota apologizes and says
they have no other choice. Fumio says that soon, he will thank them for keeping
him here as when this is all done, he will be the world’s foremost authority on
electronics. They find out that someone is playing the stolen tape and Takeshi
has to get knocked out so he can be imprisoned in the storage locker room. We
see Gengo, Machiko, and Shosaku playing the tape.
It
doesn’t make any sense to the three humans, but the tape’s sound eventually
gets the attention of Godzilla and Anguirus.
Now
this is where the Japanese Version and the English Version differ. In The
Japanese version, we see word bubbles translating what they say.
By
The Way, If You Get The DVD With The Japanese Version As Well As The English
Version….Those Word Balloons Are Missing And There Is No Translation To What
They Are Saying With Their Roars. I Actually Had To Find A Pic Of This Online
(Thanks, Synthetic Cinema) To Even Get This.
But
in the English version, the monsters roars are also mixed with some strange
voices that make Godzilla sound like he may be a bit drunk and Anguirus sound
like he may have smoked a pack of cigarettes every day. Bottom line, Godzilla
knows something is going on and tells Anguirus to check it out, which Anguirus
agrees to do.
So
Yeah, Anguirus Is Heading To Japan On A Recon Mission
Back
at Godzilla Tower, Gengo heads up the elevator. He looks around the top floor
where he finds cigarettes used and a lighter, the lighter which he takes.
Kubota finds Gengo and wonders what he is doing. Gengo says he was looking for
him and gives him the layouts for his monsters.
Gengo
goes back home and we find out that the lighter Gengo found definitely belonged
to Machiko’s brother, confirming that he is being held captive. Gengo also
finds it strange that the Fumio, who is Kubota’s superior, is way younger than
him. Shosaku says that they need to do some digging into the background of both
Fumio and Kubota. We then get a montage of them going to find information on
the two, finding what they are looking for, and leaving to go to where Fumio
lived. Meanwhile, Anguirus is swimming to Japan.
At
the home, they meet Fumio’s parents and after a bit of conversation, they find
out the starling truth that both Fumio and Kubota (who was Fumio’s teacher)
both died in a rock climbing accident over a year ago.
Back
in Godzilla Tower, Fumio gets a message from Space Hunter M Nebula that the
change of plans have been approved and prepare for the arrival. They are about
to send one of the tapes when they are interrupted by news of the arrival of
Anguirus.
And
the military immediately comes out to fight Anguirus and the people of the
nearby town are evacuated.
When
Anguirus arrives to the beach, he is met by searchlights.
Any
Monster Knows This Is Not A Good Welcoming Committee.
Afterwards,
it is time for the military to give Anguirus everything they got with tanks,
missiles, cannons, and masers.
In
a rare example of military competency, Anguirus basically says…
Screw
You, Guys…I’m Going Home
Back
at Godzilla Tower, Kubota asks Fumio about what to do with Takeshi and Fumio
says that now that we’ve seen the power of the Earth’s forces, there is no need
to keep him alive for study. Meanwhile, Takeshi is again trying to find a way
to escape. Gengo also arrives at the building and sees a very strange wire next
to a door.
After
they play tug-o-war for a few minutes, they introduce each other through the
door and Gengo tells Takeshi that he will find a way to get the captive out of
there. Kubota comes in and asks what is going on, causing Gengo to let go of
the wire and play like he was looking for him to talk about his opinion on the
layouts he gave him the other day. Kubota tells Gengo he has no business up and
to go back to his office. Gengo is about to leave when Kubota gives him a pack
of cigarettes.
After
Gengo leaves, Kobuta asks Fumio’s opinion on Gengo. Fumio says the employee is
stupid, but cunning…which makes him a curious specimen.
Gengo
goes back to his house where Machiko and Shosaku are waiting. Gengo reveals
that he has found Takeshi in Godzilla Tower, but their conversation is
interrupted by Kubota and two henchmen. He reveals the cigarettes he gave them
have small transmitters so they knew exactly where he was at all times. Kubota
also gets back the stolen tape and then has his goons draw guns on them.
They
intend to kill them all, but Tomoko arrives just in time and uses her karate
skills to take down the three.
She
tells the bad guys to get out and they do. The good guys all try to explain the
situation to the authorities, but the authorities don’t believe their story so
they won’t do anything. They then get word that Anguirus is coming back, but
this time he has Godzilla with him.
Back
at Godzilla Tower, they are receiving plans from Space Hunter M Nebula and are
getting the tapes ready to transmit. Fumio then gives a speech about this being
the day they planned for in order to get eternal and perfect peace. The tapes
are then played. Those tapes summon forth two space gems.
The
red gem explodes to unveil King Ghidorah.
Since
this is the first time we have ever covered King Ghidorah, here is some info on
him. He is Godzilla’s biggest rival, being the one that Godzilla has fought the
most times. He first debuted in Ghidorah: The Three Head Monster, and has been
appeared or some version close to him in 11 films (9 against Godzilla and 2
against Mothra). He has a unique design in that he has three heads and no arms
of any kind so basically his two side heads might as well be his arms. He spits
out lightning fire and has two legs, two tails, and two wings….making him a
force to be reckoned with.
The
other gem explodes to reveal the titular monster Gigan.
Since
I really did not explain Gigan in my Godzilla vs. Megalon induction, here it
is. Gigan is a strange cybernetic monster with the steel beak like a bid with
steel mandibles as well. He has one eye with spikes on his back and special
razors on his chest and stomach. He has a tail, two feet, and two hooks for
arms. He shoots lasers out of his eyes, uses his giant hook hands as weapons,
flies at you like a missile, and don’t get to close to him as those razors on
his chest and stomach are like a saw and will cut you in half if he wants to
give you a big hug. He has my favorite monster design, but some of you may hate
him if you ever played the NES game Godzilla: Monster of Monsters since in the
game, he may be the most hardest of monsters to deal with since that little saw
he uses can take away all your life as he corners you.
He’s
Not Even The Final Boss Of The Game And You Have To Deal With Him At Least Four
Times.
Now
that all the intros are out of the way, back to the movie as King Ghidorah and
Gigan head to planet Earth as Godzilla and Anguirus swim to Japan.
Back
outside Godzilla Tower, the good guys formulate a plan on how to get Takeshi
out of there with Gengo and Tomoko going in there to get them out while Machiko
and Shosaku stay behind in case Gengo and Tomoko get captured trying to free
Takeshi. Gengo decides that he and Tomoko should use the stairs since they are
less likely to get caught that way. This is okay for Tomoko who is fit, but
Gengo has a tough time getting up all those stairs.
They
eventually get up there and make perfect timing as two goons have been sent to
kill Takeshi as the bad guys have no use for him anymore.
Tomoko
knocks the two guards out and the three try to escape, but get captured almost
immediately.
Kubota
says they should consider themselves lucky as he was going to kill them
straight away, but instead he wants to be a bad guy and let them live just to
see all of their evil plans. Fumio seems okay with this as well when they come
in the villains’ HQ. Meanwhile, Machiko and Shosaku know immediately that they
have been captured since it has been more than ten minutes and immediately go
to plan B.
Fumio
reveals that Gengo, Tomoko, and Takeshi will be used as host bodies for soon to
be arriving friends from Space Hunter M Nebula. Kubota reveals that they have
tried other species, but find humans to be the best uses for this planet.
Kubota reveals that their home world used to be like Earth when the people
their destroyed their way of life with pollution.
He
reveals that Earth will go the same way in time, but some creatures will
survive like the creatures that survived on Space Hunter M Nebula. But, while
they have taken over their planet, the planet is still dying so they need to
take over Earth and keep it from ending up the same way. We finally get the
answer to their wanting of peace in that it is just peace for their species and
no one else. A lightning storm cuts the power for a bit, but the emergency
power light is able to reveal via shadow what these aliens truly are.
SPACE
COCKROACHES!!!!!
Oh
and despite Godzilla and Anguirus being closer to Japan than King Ghidorah and
Gigan, the two bad monsters get their first.
The
military realizes this and knows by the sounds the monsters make that one of
them is King Ghidorah, but the other monster they have never heard before. The
military is sent out again to fight this new threat.
Meanwhile
both King Ghidorah and Gigan fly around Godzilla Tower just so the aliens can
reveal the monsters to their human captives.
They
also explain that they are controlling them and that their action patterns are
all recorded on the tapes and that was why they had to get the stolen tape back
as without it, they would have no control over the two space monsters. And now
it is time for the monsters to start attacking Tokyo.
And
we even get to see Gigan’s razor front abdomen destroy a building.
More
destruction ensues.
And
it continues to the point that I don’t need anymore pics. Well, it’s finally
time for the military to take action.
The
tanks do not work as King Ghidorah makes quick work of them.
But
how about the missiles?
Meanwhile
Godzilla and Anguirus are still at sea trying to get there.
Ghidorah
then destroys a boat.
The
destruction continues and it is now time for the planes to attempt an attack.
Since
Ghidorah had been doing most of the destruction of military vehicles, it is now
Gigan’s turn to get his fair share.
The
masers finally make an appearance and we get an original scene that was ripped
off in Godzilla vs. Megalon of the masers attacking and the monster hiding in
the trees before shooting his projectile and destroying them.
With
all this monster on building and military action, I almost forgot about our
human captives. They are all locked up in that storage room while Machiko and
Shosaku are driving back with supplies for the Plan B.
Meanwhile,
the space monsters are still causing havoc when Godzilla and Anguirus finally
show up.
Kobuta
is not happy that Godzilla is here, but Fumio says that his appearance is a
necessary part of their plan and they have to attract Godzilla to Godzilla
Tower so they can kill him.
Meanwhile,
it is time for a tag team battle.
Gigan
tries to fly at Godzilla, but Godzilla’s atomic breath takes him down.
Ghidorah
starts attacking Godzilla with his lightning beams. Gigan goes to attack
Godzilla again, but Anguirus tries intercepts. Unfortunately, Gigan gets on top
of Anguirus instead.
Finally,
we see Machiko and Shosaku with the balloon and rope in hopes of rescuing the
three captives.
The
balloon goes up with the rope and the rope is tied at both ends and it is time
for our captives to try and zipline to freedom.
Gengo
and Tomoko get down okay with no incident, but when Takeshi goes down, the bad
guy henchmen see the plan and shoot the balloon and rope, but thankfully
Takeshi got down far enough so that the fall didn’t hurt him.
The
henchmen tell Kubota and Fumio of the escape and the bad guys see a car leaving.
Thinking it is them, they reveal that Godzilla Tower can fire laser beams.
The
heroes were not in that car and they just destroyed a car that was empty yet
moving due to human ingenuity. We then get King Ghidorah knocking Godzilla into
a bridge with an obvious day for night editing.
Yeah,
Some Of This Footage Is Lifted From Ghidorah The Three Headed Monster, Godzilla
Vs. Monster Zero, & Destroy All Monsters.
We
then hear from the bad guys that Godzilla is coming this way, which Kubota says
is perfect. Fumio says that if they can kill Godzilla, then they have won.
Meanwhile, Gigan is kicking the shit out of Anguirus. Then we get the infamous,
often copied stock footage of King Ghidorah shooting lightning at Godzilla’s
crotch.
Suddenly,
Godzilla goes Muhammad Ali.
Meanwhile,
we see the good guys formulating with the military how they can get a small
group in there and destroy Godzilla Tower, thus stopping the aliens from
controlling the space monsters. Now for a bit that was done in Godzilla vs.
Megalon, but was copied from this film: The Gigan attacking Godzilla with
flying attacks loop.
All
of this leads Godzilla close to World Children’s Land, where Godzilla is drawn
to Godzilla Tower.
Once
close enough, the aliens at Godzilla Tower starts shooting laser beams in an
attempt to kill Godzilla.
The
aliens keep firing at Godzilla, while Anguirus is getting his ass kicked by
both King Ghidorah and Gigan. Meanwhile, our good guys get some help from the
military to set up a trap for the aliens in Godzilla Tower. They pile packs of
TNT and cover them behind a drawing of the good guys.
But
of course, this fucking works as the henchmen fire at the stupid poster and the
poster destroys the Godzilla Tower weapon.
We
see Fumio and Kubota wondering how their plan could fail and are upset that
they are dying before turning into roaches and die.
With
Godzilla Tower done for, King Ghidorah and Gigan are no longer under the
aliens’ control and all that the good guys can hope for is that Godzilla isn’t
already dead from the barrage of laser beams. Well, good news is Godzilla isn’t
dead, but the bad news is Gigan is going to use his hooks on him.
Gigan
drags Godzilla over to Ghidorah so both monsters can beat him up.
King
Ghidorah then throws Godzilla into what is left of Godzilla Tower.
Ghidorah:
By
All Means, My Good Monster
Little
do they know that by destroying the rest of Godzilla Tower, Godzilla has hulked
up.
Godzilla
and Gigan start having a straight up fight. King Ghidorah is too busy watching
this that he doesn’t notice Anguirus get back up and bite him in one of his two
tails.
King
Ghidorah gets pissed at this so he and Anguirus fight.
King
Ghidorah takes Anguirus down while Godzilla takes Gigan down. The two
archnemeses then come to blow again. Gigan tries to fly at Godzilla, but
Godzilla ducks and he runs into Ghidorah.
Ghidorah
gets mad at Gigan while Godzilla gives Anguirus a pep talk. Anguirus then does
what I can only show and not explain.
Godzilla
beats up Gigan some more and then helps Anguirus with Ghidorah and this looks a
lot similar to when Jet Jaguar held Megalon for Godzilla to do his stupid ass
attack.
Godzilla
then does three reverse neckbreakers to King Ghidorah
Godzilla stomps on one of King Ghidorah’s necks and it is at this point, Ghidorah and Gigan have had enough.
Everyone
including Godzilla and Anguirus celebrate and it ends with a sappy Japanese
song as Godzilla and Anguirus head home.
Godzilla:
Don’t
Bother. Next Time Either Of Us Come, It Will Be As If Nothing Ever Happen.
That’s Japan For Ya.
And
that is Godzilla vs. Gigan for ya. Godzilla would be back in more films. This
would actually be King Ghidorah’s last Showa film appearance as he would be in
a few episodes of Zone Fighter fighting Zone Fighter and Godzilla. Ghidorah
would then return in the Hensai Era, the Millennium Era, and be in the American
film sequel Godzilla: King Of The Monsters in 2019. Gigan would appear in
Godzilla vs. Megalon, get destroyed in an episode of Zone Fighter that Godzilla
was also in, and wouldn’t appear again after that until Godzilla: Final Wars.
Anguirus would appear once more in the Showa Era in Godzilla vs. Mecha-Godzilla
where Mecha-Godzilla would basically kill him and would then appear in Godzilla:
Final Wars, where Godzilla would kill him.
As
far as the cast and crew go, only two people from this film would ever continue
on in Godzilla films. Kunio Murai (who played Takashi) would be in Return Of
Godzilla/Godzilla 1985 and Godzilla, Mothra, & King Ghidorah: All Monsters
Attack. The biggest of course would be Kenpachiro Satsuma (who was in the Gigan
suit). He would also be in the Gigan suit for Godzilla vs. Megalon and then,
would don the Godzilla suit for all the Heisei Era. Of course, this would cause
him to pass out many times and that passing out was especially a problem in
Godzilla vs. Destroyah as to replicate the fact that Godzilla was about to
meltdown, the steam effect in his suit was achieved by using pure carbon
monoxide. Yeah, it was freaking hell for him.
Unfortunately,
a few people would also pass away. Gen Shimizu (who played the commander of the
military) would no longer be with us in 1975 at the age of 68. Kuniko Ashihara
(who played Fumio’s mom) would die in 1997 at the age of 82. Jun Fukuda (who
was the director) died in 2000 at the age of 77 from cancer. Toshiaki Nishizawa
(who played Kubota) passed away in 2013 at the age of 77 from cancer. Harou
Nakajima (who was in the Godzilla suit) would die in 2017 at the age of 88
after complications from pneumonia.
In
case my induction of this film hasn’t given it away yet, I like this film
despite many people not liking this film. There is a lot of monster action in
this film and I do not mind the human story too. The only issues I have is the
Anguirus for the most part was kind of worthless, except for the stupid scene.
I don’t know why this film isn’t as well liked.
One boring film and one enjoyable film. Let's see what is next on the list.
Better Find My Trucker Hat
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