Monster Crap
Inductee: Friday The 13th Part VII: The New Blood
Jason Meets…A Carrie Rip-Off
Well,
curiosity killed the cat as when I did a poll for this month’s induction which
covers films that have connections with inductions 51-100 and it was pretty
convincing that you all decided that I get to go back to Camp Crystal Lake and
induct another film about our favorite undead hockey mask-wearing slasher. Now
before we have inducted Jason when he went to Manhattan and when he went into
outer space. But this time, we get to see Jason fight an enemy who horror fans
have been wanting Jason to fight for years.
Well,
they wanted that, but the problems were that well…the two slasher villains were
owned by two different companies and the two companies didn’t see eye to eye on
how the film should go. So instead the filmmakers had tease a Carrie so they
could get Jason vs. Carrie. But first I have to talk about Carrie.
In
1974, a young author named Stephen King would write his first of many horror
bestsellers with the book about a shy girl who is bullied by other students and
abused by her psychotic religious mother, who finds she has telekinetic powers
and awakens her powers in the most terrifying and murderous way during prom,
thanks to a horrible prank. The book was a huge hit and would become adapted to
a well-made movie by Brian De Palma and starring Academy Award Winning Actress
Sissy Spacek.
It
became a huge film and so the people who were making this film decided this
film needed a Carrie, but they can’t get the real Carrie White from the Carrie
film because well, spoiler: Carrie died at the end of the story. So they had to
instead create a new character who would have the same telekinetic powers and
the same immaturity to originally not be able to control her powers.
And
since the idea was made, we needed a director and the director role was given
to special effects wizard John Carl Buechler. If that name sounds familiar here
in Monster Crap, well…years after this film would get made, he would direct…
So
we may be very familiar with Buechler and if you know one thing, his effects
are very good. Also, we needed a cast and first, we need someone who could don
the Jason Voorhees costume and that went to a man Buechler worked with in a
film called Prison and had to convince the producers to go with, Kane Hodder
instead of CJ Graham, who was Jason in Part VI and was more than willing to
come back as Jason. Based on the fact that Kane Hodder would become Jason in
other films (two of which I inducted) since then and that streak would only end
in Freddy vs. Jason, which understandably pissed a lot of people off….the
decision to go with Kane Hodder was a great idea.
Next
we needed victims and survivors. Well, most of them will be people from horror
movies of the past who were getting roles based on simple auditions, like most
of these people in slasher films. Well, the only person I can mention who may
have already had their big break was Susan Blu, who was a voice actress and was
in the animated Transformers movie of 1985.
So
with that said, let’s get to the induction.
We
then get a narration talking about the legend of Jason Voorhees, which is
spliced over footage of all the past Friday The 13th films and
recapping the last Jason Voorhees film, Friday The 13th Part VI:
Jason Lives, which just so happens to be my favorite of the films.
You’ll
See Why My Love Of This Film Makes Me Scoff At The Excuses Made For Some Of Why
I Do Not Like Part VII.
And
if you are kind of wondering if I will be inducting any of the films before
this, the answer is no. Why? Because Part 1 is about his mother, who is very
much human.
Part
II Is also good so that isn’t happening, as was Friday The 13th Part
IV: The Final Chapter. You could sort of make a case for how hokey Friday The
13th Part III (In 3D), but here is the thing. You could argue very
well that Jason Voorhees didn’t die until Part IV: The Final Chapter when
little Tommy Jarvis (played by Corey Feldman) killed him. And Part V: A New
Beginning? Well, I guess I might have to spoil some poor soul who still lives
under a rock and somehow found this site, but…
Jason
Isnt The Killer In That One Either. It Was Some Ambulance Worker Whose Son (Who
He Was A Deadbeat Dad To) Died, Dressed As Jason.
And
even if you want to try and say that Jason Voorhees was in the film, in
dreams…A New Beginning is only really terrible if you factor in the ending,
which you do have every right to do, but doesn’t mean I am going to be
inducting it. Also as I have mentioned, Part VI: Jason Lives is awesome and
there is no way in freaking hell I am touching that film so this will be the
earliest I will go into the Jason saga. Let’s get back to the movie.
This
montage ends with Jason Voorhees having a chain around his neck (which is
attached to an giant rock)…
…and
being stuck under water.
The
Jason mask shines at us, nearly blinding people before cracking in half
revealing the title.
We
then go to a house where a little girl named Tina is outside, hearing her
parents having an argument. You hear dad is drinking and he decides to slap
mom. This terrifies Tina and she runs towards the dock. Dad hears that Tina is
outside and goes to talk to her. He sees that Tina is going on a boat to get
away from the situation and he tries to convince her to come back. They have an
argument with Tina hating her dad and the dad trying to apologize so he can get
her to come home.
She
wishes her dad were dead and accidentally causes the dock to collapse on the
dad, killing him.
This
horrifies Tina’s mom and Tina is also very sad, regretting what she has
unknowingly done. A now grown up Tina wakes up as that was all a nightmare of
remembering the past.
Tina’s
mom is also there, who looks like she hasn’t aged a day since dad died.
Tina
says she doesn’t think what they are doing is such a good idea, but Tina’s mom
(named Amanda) says that her psychiatrist Dr. Crews said this would help with
her therapy and this is going to be hard on all of them. Tina says it doesn’t
seem to be hard for the good doctor, but Tina’s mom says he really cares about
her and doesn’t want her to go back to the mental hospital. And what are they
doing?
Oh and yeah, I guess between Part VI and VII, they gave up on the idea of keeping the bad memories locked away by calling it Forest Green and just calling it Crystal Lake. And
Dr. Crews is waiting for them at the place, who Tina calls Bad News Crews.
Bad
News Brown (Or Allen) And Bad News Barrett Are Going To Disagree With This Punk
Getting That Moniker.
Pleasantries
are exchanged as we also see that they have neighbors in some kids renting the
house next door for summer vacation.
One
of the female teens (who we will see is the bitch of the group) says “There
goes the neighborhood.” Once inside, Amanda wonders if this is really a good
idea to bring Tina here. Dr. Crews says that they have done all they can do for
her at the hospital yet Tina hasn’t gotten better enough to be discharged. He
tells Amanda to trust him that this is the best for everyone. Tina gets out her
suitcase and I guess forgot to lock it as all the contents come out so the guy
washing the car (revealed to be Nick) goes to help her.
Sparks
Start Flying Between The Two, Even Though The Actors Playing The Two Hated Each
Other Behind The Scenes.
And
if you are wondering how I know they hated each other? Well…
Anyway….the
two actors hated each other and of course since they are going to be the two
that end up together, you can easily tell these that as these two have no
chemistry at all.
Inside,
we see that Crews has other plans as he wants Tina to show off her telekinetic
abilities, by getting a matchbook to move.
He
gets unhappy initially when it isn’t moving and verbally abuses her so it can
move. It moves and then Dr. Crews asks what did she do to get it to move,
basically asking her what went through her mind. Tina reveals that she was
thinking about him, which he laughs. He tells her that her psychokinetic
abilities are a projection of the suppressed guilt feelings that she has over
what she did to her dad. She tells him to speak English and she thinks he is
more interested in these abilities than he is of her. He tries to deny such a
thing and she still says that is bullshit, which causes the matches to catch on
fire.
She
gets upset about this and leaves the room as Crews looks at the matches on
fire, saying that he rests his case.
We
go to the other house and two people are having sex.
The
guy (named Russell) asks if this is his uncle’s house, why they are sleeping in
the van. The girl (named Sandra) responds by asking who says they are sleeping.
And they continue with the sex.
That
night, Tina sees a picture of her father and gets sad.
Interestingly
Enough, Tina Did Her Own Stunts And Caused Herself A Migraine Forcing Herself
To Cry In This Film
As her mom asks what is wrong, Tina reveals that she misses her dad so much. Amanda says that she misses him too and here comes Dr. Crews to look on like an asshole. She sees him and leaves in anger. Tina heads out and goes out onto the lake. Tina thinks about what she did and she tries to bring back her father. Unfortunately, her feelings and abilities brings someone else back to life as Jason is freed from his chains and rises from the depths of Crystal Lake.
Tina
sees what she has done and faints. Jason goes ashore and we see some of the
great effects that Mr. Buechler has graced this film.
Amanda
and Dr. Crews see Tina has fainted and come to her aid. She wakes up and asks
where he is. They wonder who she is talking about and Tina reveals she saw a
man coming out of the lake, but she can’t describe him. Dr. Crews immediately
thinks this is just a delusion caused by her guilt and she feels insulted by
his assumptions. Dr. Crews has one of his nice moments and calmly tells Tina to
not run away from the past as the guilt over her father is a powerful thing.
Tina then says that the man she saw wasn’t her father, but Dr. Crews still
thinks it is what it was and Tina gets so mad she breaks a photo of her dad.
A
couple Jane and Michael are stuck as their car has died and they are of course
supposed to be part of the party next door.
They
go on foot and Jane reveals that Nick will be there as well as a planned
surprise party for Michael for his birthday. She even revealed that she got
this great cabin and everything. Michael is happy about this whole thing and
Jane reveals that the whole thing is ruined now.
Tina
answers the door and it is Nick, who apologizes for earlier and gives her a
piece of clothing that she left behind in her anger. Amanda also appears and
Nick tries to invite Amanda to a party they are holding a surprise party for
his cousin. Tina doesn’t know if she should go, but Amanda says that Tina can
always spend the evening with her and Dr. Crews, which causes Tina to
immediately accept the invitation. Dr. Crews comes in after Tina leaves and
voices his objections about this being a distraction, but Amanda says it will
be fine.
Back
in the woods, Michael tells Jane that he will be back in two shakes because he
has to pee. He goes off to pee and Jane immediately gets killed by Jason.
You
see, every kill in this film done by Jason was even gorier than they are in the
film. But the MPAA (the censors who give movies a grade and are complete
hypocrites when it comes to grading things) had a complete hard-on for the gore
in this series and if any scene showed too much gore, it was cut to get an R rating.
Basically, it was butchered and you will need the deluxe edition of this DVD to
see the cut scenes in the deleted scenes section, which are in terrible
condition because they couldn’t get the originals and clean it up. While it
definitely does hurt this film, my big problem is Part VI. Part VI is not even
as gory as this film in its current form so you can still make a quality film
if you have likable characters and awesome music, which this film does not
because they were more concerned with effects than anything else.
This
death is actually one of the deaths that was not cut. Moving on, Michael is
done with his piss break and goes towards Jane. Unfortunately, he comes across
Jane’s body.
Michael
is shocked by this, but he doesn’t have time to register this as Jason comes
after him. Michael tries to run away, but unless you are one of the main
characters, you are dead.
Michael
still tries to crawl away and Jason comes over to finish the job by grabbing
the spike and lifting Michael with the spike before throwing him off.
Edited Version Since Work Print Showed Jason Picking Him Up By The Spike And Throwing Him Off, But I Think You Get The Point With The Edited Version
Of
course, you would see the whole process of him lifting him up by the knife, but
cuts so you only see him down and then up in short time and then being thrown
off.
We
go to the party as Nick brings in Tina. Some guy in what looks like an air
force jacket named Eddie grabs Tina and asks her about an idea called
Starlicon, which is a movie idea he has.
He
wonders if she thinks it is good and all she can do is smile and walk away,
which means it is a terrible idea. Nick tells her that Eddie is a bit off the
rails, but everyone else is normal. That of course is a lie as we have a stoner
named David.
Two
girls who have the hots for the stoner (Maddy the nerd and Robin the redhead)
Sigh…What
do you want?
Just thought you should know that the attractive
redhead has been in some softcore porn films like Exotic House of Wax, Virtual
Encounters, Vice Academy 3 & 4, etc.
Is
that all?
Yeah….sadly she quit the acting business in the 90s
and is now secretary to some controversial activist.
Anything
else so I can continue this review?
Oh sure….I just swore I knew her from somewhere and of
course, looked through my collection to see her in it. Virtual Encounters is
the one I know the most from. But carry on…I got some awesome shit in my room
that I can’t wait to see so smell ya later.
Getting
back on track…
Russell
freaks about the place being a mess and that they were supposed to bring their
own food and not his uncle’s food, which probably means they may not have
completely rented the cabin as I originally thought. Nick introduces Tina to
the gang. There is noise so Sandra has Nick help her as the bitch returns.
She
does not like Tina as she sees him as competition for Nick’s affections, which
she wants. As they are all messing
around, Tina sees a vision of Michael’s death.
She
drops a bottle and runs off. Nick goes after her, but Melissa stops him so she
can hit on him.
Tina
goes home and tells her mom and the doctor about her visions. When Dr. Crews
wonders about what she saw, she says she didn’t really see it, but she knows it
happened. Dr. Crews once again believes it is just delusions of her father and
says it was a bad idea to allow her to go to the party next door. She says that
there is a large thing in their back porch, which Dr. Crews goes to check on.
Dr. Crews says it isn’t there and shows them the spot, which is empty.
Except
For The Obvious Hole That Shows That Dr. Crews Saw The Spike, Removed It, And
Is Hiding It In His Fucking Pockets.
Tina
wonders what is happening to her and Dr. Crews calms her down as Amanda takes
her daughter in the house.
We
then go to a couple Dan and Judy camping out in the woods, when Judy says that
she is cold.
Dan
responds to this with a proposition that they crawl up in the sack, which is of
course meaning he wants sex. Judy just wants him to fix the fire and Dan says
there is no wood, which the woman tells him to go get some since it is gonna be
a cold night tonight. Dan goes out with his machete to get some. Once Dan
leaves, Judy decides that she wants to surprise him by having some of her
clothes off when he gets back.
Dan
is searching for wood when he hears branches crack behind him, meaning someone
else is walking in the woods. Dan thinks about it before cutting some wood. He
goes to bring the wood back to the campfire when Jason decides to punch him
through his back and break his neck.
Jason
sees that Dan has a machete and decides that he wants it.
Judy
of course is unhappy that Dan is not back, but that unhappiness doesn’t matter
as Jason shows up.
Judy
screams and hides in her sleeping back, which she thinks is supposed to stop
Jason for some reason. Jason decides that he is going to drag the sleeping bag
with her in it and swing it against a tree, resulting in instant death.
I
Know In The Work Print Version, Jason Swung The Sleeping Bag Five Times And You
See Blood Dripping Out Of It During The Third Swing, But I (Like Everyone Else Including The Cast & Crew) Actually Prefer The
One Swing And She Is Dead. Makes Jason Seem More Powerful.
The
next day, Eddie is pitching another film called Throngar as three girls are
listening.
They
laugh at the script idea, but Eddie said Ben liked the idea.
When
Ben doesn’t know what the hell film he is talking about, Eddie said it must
have been someone else and leaves in embarrassment. Maddy talks about how
Michael never showed up to the surprise party, but Robin says Michael probably
got pulled over for driving drunk. Ben says the guy can smell a party a hundred
miles away and is convinced Michael will be here. Ben asks where his coffee and
Kate angrily asks him where he would like it so obviously Ben did something to
piss Kate off.
Melissa
asks about Nick and Robin tells her that she “thinks he went next door to see
Marilyn Munster.”
We
then see Nick throwing stones while talking to Tina. Tina asks if they all
think she is a freak after last night and Nick asks who cares what they think
as they aren’t his friends. He just came up because of his cousin. Nick asks
where Tina is from and Tina responds by wondering where he is from. Nick fake
laughs and says they are doing really good here in conversation.
You
Can Just Taste The Chemistry Here….Of Two People Who Just Want To Get This Over
With So They Never Have To See Each Other Again
Nick
reveals that he grew up in Pittsburgh, he used to hang out with a real bad
crowd, his dad kicked him out, and now he goes to night school. Tina reveals
that her family used to come up here all the time and…hold on, the family used
to come up here all the time and yet she has never known who Jason Voorhees
was? Get the hell out of here with that BS!!!
Anyway,
she also reveals that they liked it here before her dad got killed on the lake
and now she doesn’t like it here. Nick follows to continue the conversation as
Melissa watches.
Tina
reveals that she believes she is at fault for her dad’s death and she tells
Nick that a nice guy like him doesn’t need to be hanging out with her. She says
she saw her father get killed when she was a kid and it really messed up her
head. Nick just means that she is okay now (which is baloney and he should know
that). Tina then reveals that the guy in her house is her doctor who came out
to help her from a mental hospital. Nick hears some crackling and goes to look,
but only takes a few steps before just ignoring it. Nick tries to say he saw
what she saw…which he says was a big pink elephant, which they both laugh at,
knowing he is trying to lighten the mood.
Tina
then reveals that with her luck, Nick will turn out to be another delusion, but
Nick says that he is real.
This
definitely makes Melissa mad and you know she is going to plan something later.
Tina goes back inside and seems to be in a cheerful mood. Amanda knows
something is up, but Tina denies anything.
Tina
then goes to hang out with the kids next door and Sandra wonders what happened
between Kate and Ben. Apparently, Ben blew Kate off to go hang out with Eddie
and lied to her about the whole thing. Ben and Russell are throwing the
football…
Russell
notices Ben looking at Kate and wonders what is up, but Ben just wants Russell
to continue throwing the football. Tina enters and Melissa just gives her the
cold shoulder, which Maddy says she does to everyone, except for boys. Maddy
then sees David look their way and thinks David likes her, but Robin says David
isn’t into her and she needs a makeover before a guy like that is into her.
Maddy calls her a bitch while David and Eddie go to leave, but Melissa wants
Eddie to do her a favor.
Robin
decides she is going to try to hook up with David, but Maddy tells her that she
doesn’t smoke. Robin then says that both of them agreed they were going to have
a good time and Robin isn’t going to let Maddy stop her from having a good
time.
Now
about that favor Melissa wanted from Eddie.
Yep…It Is To Make Fun Of Tina For Being In A Mental Hospital.
Yep…It Is To Make Fun Of Tina For Being In A Mental Hospital.
Tina
doesn’t like this cruel joke and uses her telekinetic powers on Tina’s
necklace.
Tina
is upset and leaves, even when Nick shows up. Nick is pissed at the friends for
teasing Tina and goes after her.
Back
at home, Tina reveals that she hates this place and she wants to leave as she
is seeing things. Tina reveals that she could have killed someone with what
happened next door, but Dr. Crews says when she is highly emotional, she can do
anything. Tina says that if Dr. Crews believes that Tina could move the
matchbook as well as break the pearl necklace, then why he won’t believe her
about seeing someone get killed. Dr. Crews says he does believe she saw it, but
the psychokinesis causes delusions.
Tina
yells at Dr. Crews that he isn’t listening. Amanda says they can leave
tomorrow, but Dr. Crews yells they are getting somewhere with Tina, but they
are going to throw it all away by leaving and Tina will go back to the mental
hospital. This causes Tina to use her powers to throw a TV at Dr. Crews.
Tina runs off and into Nick, who she wants to help her get out of here. Nick says that Melissa was a bitch, but Tina doesn’t care about Melissa. Tina says there is something really wrong here and she knows it, but no one else believes her. Nick wonders what she is talking about and Tina then asks if Michael ever shows up. Nick says he never did and Tina asked what he looked like. Nick shows Tina a picture of him and Tina reveals that it was Michael getting killed that she saw in her vision. Amanda then tells Tina to pack her things as they are going to leave in the morning, which Tina goes to do.
Outside
of the house next door, Russell asks when Sandra first fell in love with him.
She jokes about the huge bulge in his pants and the size of his wallet, which
kept telling her that he wants to take him now. Sandra decides to go skinny
dipping and Russell decides to join her. But as Russell takes off his clothes,
Jason decides there will be no skinny dipping for Russell.
Silly
Russell…No One Wants To See You With Your Clothes Off, But They Do Want To See
Me Cut Some Of Your Face Off (Which The Censors Cut)
Sandra
comes up from the water and sees Russell dead.
Sandra screams, but Jason pops out of the water.
Sandra
tries to swim away, but Jason kills her Jaws style.
Inside
the house next door, Eddie acts like King Tut for some reason.
We
see that David and Robin are hitting it off, which makes Maddy unhappy. Ben
tries to get back together with Kate while Nick is on the phone, trying to get
in touch with Michael. Kate and Ben get back together as Maddy goes to try a
makeover with makeup.
Back
outside, Jason drags Sandra’s body away so no one sees her body floating in the
water.
Nick
goes to look for Michael himself and Melissa tries to once again hit on him,
but Nick makes it finally clear that he isn’t into her. Melissa tries to make
Nick jealous by hitting on Eddie, who is thinking up a Star Mummy idea, but
Nick doesn’t care. Also Jason is looking through a window.
There
Is A Party Going On And No One Invited Me?? Bastards!!! They Will Sooooo Be
Getting Killed Now!!!
Dr.
Crews is in his office and we get the revelation that we all know.
Melissa
says to Eddie that she finds him cute. Amanda looks for Dr. Crews, but she only
finds evidence that Dr. Crews was more into Tina’s powers and not Tina’s
welfare. Dr. Crews is actually outside and sees the dead body of Michael.
Crews
is spooked off by this. When he gets to his office and sees Amanda there, the
jig is up, but he still tries to lie to her. But when Amanda isn’t buying it,
Crews reveals that he will do what it takes to keep Amanda in his “care”, even
if he has to commit Tina against her mother’s wishes. Tina hears this and runs
off while taking the car the Shepards got here in. Both Amanda and Dr. Crews go
after Tina.
Tina
doesn’t get too far though with the car when she crashes it after seeing an
image of Jason killing her mom.
Tina
tries to restart the car, but it is dead so Tina will have to keep running on
foot. We then see how much of a makeover Maddy has done to herself.
Maddy
goes out, looking for David so she can try to steal him away from Robin. Oh and
she does so in the woods for no reason.
Why
In The Blue Hell Would He Be Out There?? Go Back In The Hou….Ah Screw, You
Deserve To Die For This Idiocy.
Maddy
dropped her ear ring and when she finds it, Russell’s body drops from a tree.
Maddy
runs off while Jason follows. Maddy decides to hide into the tool shed and
Jason of course finds her.
Tina
runs into Nick, who is also in the woods. Tina says she just saw the vision of
her mom so she has to go find her. Dr. Crews and Amanda are in Dr. Crews’ car
and they find the crashed car. Tina isn’t there and now both of them are
worried.
Eddie
tries to have sex with Melissa while David and Robin are having sex. Jason is
outside and notices sounds of sex coming from the parked van. They are of
course from Ben and Kate. Kate hears noises from outside and they both think it
is Michael so they try to surprise him, but see no one is there. Ben goes
investigate, but it turns out to be Jason, who decides to crush Ben’s head.
Kate
wonders where Ben went and goes to find him, but she also finds Jason and Jason
also kills her.
Melissa
then reveals her bitchiness by revealing she was only into Eddie as an attempt
to get Nick jealous. Eddie reveals that he can take it since he has been
rejected by some of the finest science fiction magazines. Eddie leaves to go
take a cold shower as he has a date with a soap on a rope. Meanwhile, David and
Robin are still having sex. Jason decides that he doesn’t like a house with electricity
so he pulls the cord out of the socket with his bare hands.
David
wonders what happened to the lights and Robin doesn’t care so they continue
having sex.
Tina
and Nick find Michael’s dead body and Nick is sad about his cousin’s death.
Tina
says that she saw it in her vision and gets Nick to come with her so they can
get out of Crystal Lake. Meanwhile, Jason finally enters the house where the
kids are partying. David wakes up and says he is hungry so he goes downstairs
with a flashlight to get some food, but Jason is down there and goodbye to the
stoner.
Tina
and Nick run back to the house and into Dr. Crews’ office. There, she realizes
that yes, Crews was lying about the spike not being on the outside wall
earlier. She finds Crews’ gun and gets it for in case she runs into Jason. Oh,
and Dr. Crews seemed to have specific knowledge that Jason was around thanks to
news articles in his notebook. But thanks to this, Tina now knows that it is
Jason. Tina starts getting emotional so the room starts to shake.
Back
in the house next door, Eddie reads Michael’s Happy Birthday cards as Melissa
sneaks out of the house. Eddie then opens a gift for Michael that says it is
personal penis enlarger, when it really is just a magnifying glass. Jason sees
Eddie opening up the gifts and while hearing footsteps, Eddie thinks it is
Melissa changing her mind, but realizes that it is Jason and gets killed.
Nick
takes Tina downstairs and tells her that if Jason is out there, then he wants
to get everyone together and get them out of the place. Tina feels that her
mother is in the wood, which Nick responds that he wants to get everyone
together first.
Jason
then goes up the stairs. Robin goes looking for David since he has been gone
for a while. She goes into David’s room thinking he forgot about her and went
to sleep, but he isn’t there. She hears noises coming from the closet and
checks to see if it is David, but it was just a cat.
A
Failed Attempt At A Cheap Jump Scare That Makes No Freaking Sense Since How Did
The Cat Get In That Closed Closet And Who’s Cat Is It Since No One Seemed To
Have Owned A Cat.
She
breathes a sigh of relief that the noises were just a cat. Robin decides she
wants to pet the cat.
She
sees that there is blood on the bed and sees Josh’s head.
Jason
barges in the door as Robin screams.
Well, Due To Your Hotness (And Due To The Fact That The Director Decided Your Original Death Was Too Fake And Overplayed), I’m Gonna Just Have To Throw You Out Of A Window.
They
actually had to do reshoots for that entire scene since the original death was
not okay, which would explain the whole cat getting killed. Oh and it was a
stuntwoman (or stuntman depending on who you ask) with a red wig and the
actress’ nightie who was thrown out the window so those are man legs you see.
Back
at the other house, Tina wants Nick to round up all the teens up like he wants
to do, but she needs to stay behind in case her mother comes home. Nick tells
Tina not to move as he goes to get the rest. Jason leaves the house and goes
into the woods where he runs into Dr. Crews and Amanda. Dr. Crews goes full on
heel as he throws Amanda into Jason so Jason can kill her and he can hopefully
escape.
Another
Edited Scene So You Never Have To See The Blade Penetrate Mrs. Shepard, All The
While Kind Of Knowing What Happened….Lame
Nick
looks for the teens and he finds the body of Eddie.
Nick
is shocked by this and decides to leave the house just in case Jason is still
there (even though we all know Jason left). He goes back and sees that Tina is
not where he left her. He looks for her, but when a door open, Nick points his
gun out and it is just Melissa.
Okay,
I Know This May Not Be The Time To Say This…But Melissa Basically Just
Trespassed Into The House. I Mean, She Was Never Invited In Nor Did Anyone Open
The Door For Her So….Yeah, Melissa Could Be A Burglar.
Nick
explains the situation and like a dumbass, Melissa doesn’t believe any of this.
We then see Tina outside and of course, she runs into Dr. Crews. When Tina asks
about her mother, Dr. Crews tries to lie and say she is back at the house, but
since Tina was just there…she knows that is a lie. Dr. Crews grabs her and
after Tina frees herself from him, she notices blood on the good doctor. Tina
asks Crews about what he did and Crews says she has to help him since Jason is
after him. Crews also reveals that Amanda is dead and Tina runs away from him.
Dr.
Crews continues running on his own, but he runs into Jason with a brush cutter.
Jason
uses the brush cutter to kill Dr. Crews.
Okay, I’ll Admit It. The Censors Cutting Of This Scene To Shreds Really Pisses Me Off As It Could Have Been One Of The Best Kills Jason Has Ever Done.
Tina
finds her mom’s body and mourns her death.
She
sees Jason and runs after him for some reason. She sees a yellow shirt and
knows it is from Kate and Kate is with the shirt.
She
backs up and bumps into Sandra’s naked body.
And
Maddy’s body is also there.
And
Russell’s body swings off a tree.
Tina
runs and comes face to face with Jason.
Tina
finally gets control of her powers and uses it to have roots from a tree try to
drown Jason.
That
isn’t enough so Tina decides to cut some power cables and electrocute Jason as
well.
And
this is the beginning of where my biggest gripe with the movie is. In this
movie, Jason gets seemingly dead a lot of times after something happens and I
mean a lot. You can do a fake ending to surprise the audience, but when you do
it so many freaking times, it gets annoying and you just want it to be over.
And while normally, you can do a cool thing that can make it seem okay for the
multiple fake deaths, but this movie only has three cool moment to okay some of
the fake deaths. With the amount of time, they do this, they need more to not
piss me off.
Anyway,
Jason falls over because of this and Tina thinks Jason is dead, but when she
gets close…Jason gets up and Tina runs. Tina gets back to the house where she
runs into the party house. Jason decides to jump through the window in style.
Tina
screams, but she faces off with Jason. And Tina uses her powers to close the
door.
Jason
just basically breaks down the barricade like it was nothing. Tina backs away
and uses her power to throw some furnature at Jason.
She
finds David’s decapitated head, which Jason moved to the potted plant for some
reason.
Tina
then throws a potted plant with the head at Jason.
Tina
runs out of the house with Jason chasing her and Tina uses her powers to have
the porch collapse on Jason.
Thinking
she just killed Jason…
Tina
goes back into the other house where she runs into Nick and Melissa. Tina
reveals that her mom is dead and she believes she killed Jason. Nick hugs her
in a way that so convinces me he truly cares.
And
of course, we then see Jason is not dead as he breaks through the debris. Back
at the house, Melissa yells that Tina is nuts and she basically also is now
disgusted by Nick for believing her. Melissa decides she is going back to the
party house as Jason grabs an axe. She cusses out both Nick and Tina, before opening
the door and guess who is waiting.
Jason
then buries the hatchet on Melissa’s skull and throws her to the TV so he can
focus on the two who are still alive.
Nick
and Tina try to run for the door, but Jason closes the door immediately. The
two run up the stairs with Jason following and Tina uses her power to throw a
ceiling lamp onto Jason and knock him through the stairs.
The
two go down the stairs and Jason busts through the wall to reveal he is not
dead.
Jason
throws Nick to the side and goes after him, when Tina probably does the coolest
thing in these last few minutes and breaks open Jason’s mask to reveal his
horrifying face.
Yes,
This Is What I Always Imagined Jason Looked Like Under That Mask. A Decaying
Rotten Undead Mongoloid. There Are Even Lines Where Jason Got Cut Open In Part
IV. He Is Truly Terrifying.
Tina
then decides to use her powers to create a cord from a broken ceiling light
(different one)
Jason
kicks as he is hanging and trying to gasp for air (which is weird since if he
is undead, he doesn’t need to bother with breathing). Tina creates a hole in
the floor and has Jason fall through it, like Jason was going to hell.
Tina
once again thinks Jason is dead and tends to Nick.
Jason
grabs Tina and drags her into the hole with him. He rips part of Tina’s jacket
and you can tell by Kane Hodder’s great movements as the character that he is
pissed.
Tina
then sees nails and cause them to fly at Jason.
Tina
then opens the furnace and causes a gush of fire out of it so Jason as well as
the basement to catch on fire.
Jason is completely on fire (which may have been a bit scary to Kane Hodder due to the fact that he has an accident years ago with flames that caused him to need lots of skin grafts….although he was under lots of makeup so I’m sure was well protected). But Tina seems to be stuck in the basement with the burning Jason. Thankfully, Nick is there to pull her up and they escape the house and for some reason run to the docks.
Oh
and the house explodes.
So
once again, our two think Jason is dead and at least this time, they could
really believe this is it. Nick asks if Tina is okay and all she can say is
that it is all gone. She cries over this as Nick has to hug her. Nick decides
that they need to get out of here and they start to go that way, but….
Somehow
Jason Voorhees Snuck Up On These Two And If You Have Ever Been On A Wood Dock,
You Know That It Is Next To Impossible To Do That.
Jason
goes after Tina, but Nick tries to shoot at Jason with the gun.
Nick
realizes how screwed he is as Jason knocks the gun out of his hand and throws
him into a boat. But Tina is back up and Tina uses her powers for one last
attempt. This time, her dead father comes out from the water to drag Jason
down.
Originally, Tina’s Father Was Supposed To Look Like A Zombie As He Had Been Dead For More Than A Decade (Rot And All That), But Some Dumbass Associate Producer Named Barbara Sachs Decided That She Didn’t Like That And Preferred That You Just Need To Have Some Small Stuff On Tina’s Dad And He Is Fine For The Scene. Not Kidding.
So
Tina just faints after saying Daddy and yes, this time Jason is done
for…although the director wanted a scene where Jason came out of the water to
kill some hapless fisherman, but because Fatal Attraction (which came out the
same year) had done the same fake out final scare (although in that film, the
villain was killed once last time and in this, the film would just end with
Jason alive). Oh, and also it was kind of a carbon copy of the first and third
film’s ending so it makes sense why someone wouldn’t like that scene.
So
Tina wakes up with the paramedics taking care of her as the ambulance got to
the scene of this horror the next day.
She
calls for Nick, but one of the paramedics tell her that he is alright. They put
her in the ambulance where Nick also is and the ambulance drives off.
And
with that, this film that I do not like ends.
The
movie did get #1 in the box office, but it didn’t do well overall as it
finished 53rd overall for the year. But it is considered the best
version of Jason, which is not hard to agree with. Critics hated it of course
(which is unsurprising).
As
far as what happened to the cast, John Carl Buechler has continued to be a
director and a special effects guy. Kane Hodder as you know, stayed as Jason
for a while. Susan Blu (who played Amanda) continued to do mostly voice acting like
DuckTales (Mrs. Featherby) and has become a voice director. Jennifer Banko (who
played young Tina) also ended up playing Leatherface’s daughter in Leatherface:
Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3. And how could I forget good old Terry Kiser (who
played Dr. Crews). A year after this film, he would become the character we all
know him for.
Also Got An Autograph And Picture With Kane Hodder.
My
overall thoughts on this film is I still do not like this film. I understand
the interference this film suffered from thanks to the MPAA and Barbara Sachs,
but that doesn’t count for the unlikable characters, our main couple having the chemistry of an accidental lab explosion, the overload of fake deaths, and a lack of good moments. It is still the Friday The 13th film
from Paramount that I am willing to watch the least. However, I will give the
positives like Kane Hodder is perfect as Jason Voorhees, there were some good
moments like the sleeping bag death, and the look of Jason is top notch
(despite Barbara Sachs thinking Jason looked like a bloated frog and only
wanted Jason’s mask revealed at the end (she really was an idiot)). If you are
a Jason completionist, I say “Sure, watch it”, but if you want the best of
Friday The 13th, I say watch the highlights and deleted gore scenes
(which are on Youtube) and skip this film. Next time we meet up with Jason
Voorhees (and the last time I hopefully will talk about) will be the worst in Jason
Goes To Hell: The Final Friday).
So
NegaSeth, what do you have for me next.
First Of All, I Get To Tell You What To Induct So If I
Want You To Do Another Jason Movie, You Will Do Another Jason Movie.
You
do know I said hopefully so you getting bent out of shape over that is rather
stupid.
Secondly, despite your little tease, Jason Goes To
Hell: The Final Friday will not be the next induction.
Just
get to the damn movie that I have to induct in December.
Oh, it is a movie with a bit of a winter flavor to it
and it is a film your fans have been asking for a while.
I’ve
gotten many of those films so continue.
Oh this one is special. This one has been one that has
been close to being the choice for your induction, but somehow the eventual
choice wins out. Consider this my present to all of your fans for your Grinch
like behavior.
How
am I the Grinch when the polls determine this?
Just keep annoying me with your interruptions. You do know that I am winning the Fantasy Football Bet right now, which means I would be the one to choose your summer.
…
Thank you. This is a SyFy movie that has been demanded
for you to induct so let’s unveil this sucker.