This was also an episode I was dreading since it would be the first of Matt Hardy's reign, however...I actually liked this episode and see a lot of potential with several things. The Feast or Fired Match happened (with botches), but thankfully...the right people were given title shots and the right person got fired. Maybe there is hope for Matt Hardy with this title reign, but if it is too long, it is going to suck real quick. Also like what they did with Crazzy Steve and Abyss, as well as their third member. So yeah, positives....plus we also get to talk about the TNA BS of accusing AJ Styles of making a deal with them and reneging on it.
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Wednesday, January 27, 2016
Seth & Mike's Impact Implosion - EC3 vs. Matt Hardy - Jan. 19th, 2016
Well, it is the episode I dreaded reading the spoilers, which is the episode where Matt Hardy becomes the one to defeat EC3 and become world champion, even though he turned heel to do so. This episode for me got a D- because of how bad it was (the rest of the show was bad too), but before the ending...the EC3 vs. Matt Hardy Last Man Standing Match was actually good.
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Saturday, January 16, 2016
My Top 20 Worst Films of 2015
Well, I just talked about my favorite films of 2015 so now let's get into the misery that is the worst 20 films of 2015. Now before I continue, there are many bad films that I didn't see because honestly...I didn't feel like it so here are the films I missed.
* 50 Shades Of Grey
* Aloha
* Entourage
* Fantastic Four
* Fifty Shades of Gray
* Hitman: Agent 47
* Hot Pursuit
* Jem & The Holograms
* Mortdecai
* Old Fashioned
* Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension
* Paul Blart: Mop Cop 2
* Ricki & The Flash
* Taken 3
* Terminator: Genisys
* The Boy Next Door
* The Cobbler
* The Forger
* The Gallows
* The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence)
* United Passions
* Unsullied
* Vacation
* War Room
So with all those thankful misses out of the way, let's do the dishonorable mentions aka the 5 films that just lucked out of being in the Top 20 worst in alphabetical order.
Extinction
And we start off with a zombie film that was boring as fuck. A virus turns people into zombies so people think that if they go to a snow-covered town, they are safe because if they do...the zombies will freeze to death. But as you know, these zombies somehow evolve in an attempt to survive the cold, which I could say no shit that was going to happen. But that of course happens in the beginning and the zombies are in the background as we talk more about these two men (played by Matthew Fox and Jeffrey Donovan) who are brothers and are dealing with raising a daughter of one of their dead wives. And of course their is a bullshit twist involving who the father of this girl is that makes you just act like "Really, movie?"
Gun Woman
I heard a lot of praise for fans of Asian horror, but with a bad reception and a bad grade from IMDB, I just was curious to see if it was good or bad.....and it was pretty fucking bad. The acting is fucking terrible and it gets even worse when the villain of this film (who barely appears) attempts to be the head Voltaire Aro from the Twilight series. This film tries to make up for this bad acting and terrible script with nudity and gore including a naked woman hiding guns in her breasts and bullets in her legs. In the middle before the final scenes, we get loads and loads of torture porn as this teacher tries to train this girl (who he abducted) to help him get revenge for the death of his wife who the villain killed and then fucked afterwards (because he is a necrophilia rapist). Just a poor Japanese erotic action film.
Justice League: Throne of Atlantis
The worst DC animated film I have ever seen. The characters in this film are all completely unlikable and moronic. The villain is a whiny bitch who is sad that is father died and wants to take it out on the surface world, even though the guy responsible for his father's death due causing to an underwater volcano eruption was killed in the last movie. Oh and even worse, his mother who is against this world tells him this and he still says the surface world is still responsible even though like mentioned, the guy who killed his father was against the surface world. The bullshit that this villain does to start this shit is just mind boggling. Black Manta (a villain who is sorta working with the main villain, but has an objective of his own) reveals his ulterior plans and then gets eaten by a shark like a bitch. Man, you would think he was Samuel L. Jackson from Deep Blue Sea. And the good guys, they are beyond useless. If this is what the New 52 comics are like, count me out.
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The Lazarus Effect
Olivia Wilde deserves way better than this stupid film that commits one of the biggest sins in trying to act intelligent. Basically, Olivia's character gets accidentally killed in a failed experiment where they try to bring back the dead so of course, scientist dumbass decides to bring her back to life because she was his love interest. But it turns out that you really shouldn't bring back someone from the dead, especially when that person turns out to have killed someone. Yep....Olivia Wilde comes back as a demon and starts killing everyone. Despite all the mistakes, the scientists still try to fix it instead of killing her until they have no choice but to try and kill her. I really hate when a film is stupid and then tries to be smart and preach at the same fucking time.
Vice
A direct to DVD film that rips off the plot of Westworld, but sleazy. Could be a good idea where a company creates clones in a virtual world for people to do whatever they want to them (like murder) and be brought back the next day as if nothing happened. Someone who has a conscience for these clones decides to give one of them memory of their past so the clone goes on a journey to attempt to get the other clones to realize what has been going on. Both Thomas Jane and Bruce Willis are obviously doing this for a paycheck and don't even try. Ambyr Childers, the woman who they try to make this film about, is way out of her element in this film. Honestly, I would rather watch Westworld than this sanctimonious pile of garbage. Bottom line is Bruce Willis needs to not be in these direct to DVD films and if he is, don't be one of the reasons these films suck.
Now it is time to start revealing the 20 films of this year that I am not going to recommend to anyone.
20. The Loft
This film took four years to be released and it is definitely one of those that have had these release problems because the film isn't that good. It's a murder mystery where every suspect is an unlikable douche who deserves to be busted by their wives. Yeah, this whole loft is basically where the 5 of them can take their mistresses so they can have sex with them. One of the things that is supposed to make a sleazy film is the women (even the mistresses) are supposed to be somewhat attractive and none of them are. And the ending....well, a few of them are actually rewarded for their transgressions, only one of them goes to jail, and only one of them is dead. This is a male fantasy that ultimately can't even satisfy most of the male viewers because of how boring it is and how despicable it is. Hopefully, most men aren't like any of these douchebags.
19. Hot Tub Time Machine 2
Oh dear god...this film really needed John Cusack to return as the straight man. Otherwise, you get every character (including the one they try to replace him with) be annoying in their despicability. I cannot fathom the same writer and director from the first one, made this film. This is the perfect example of a film that never should have had a sequel as everyone learns their lesson at the end of the first one, but since the first one did well....a sequel was required. Oh and this film seems to have wanted their to be a third film, but it doesn't look like their will be one as this film bombed at the box office. The only moment that kind of got me a laugh was Christian Slater hosting the most disgusting game show ever.
18. The Pact 2
The original Pact was actually a surprising film for me as I didn't hear great things about it, but it was actually good in my mind and I actually liked the twist. The first one makes you think their is a supernatural evil force out there, but the supernatural force turns out to be good and someone who is still alive is the monster. So what does the sequel do? The killer who dies in the first movie is teased to be the supernatural killer and the character that we rooted for in the first film to survive this film, is killed off for a character, who is acted by someone not as good. Also we get someone being a copycat killer, who is only doing this because the killer wants him to convince his girlfriend to continue his killings. And then we get a stupid ass ending that tries to set up a third film, but I hope to god that NEVER happens. Just leave well enough alone.
* 50 Shades Of Grey
* Aloha
* Entourage
* Fantastic Four
* Fifty Shades of Gray
* Hitman: Agent 47
* Hot Pursuit
* Jem & The Holograms
* Mortdecai
* Old Fashioned
* Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension
* Paul Blart: Mop Cop 2
* Ricki & The Flash
* Taken 3
* Terminator: Genisys
* The Boy Next Door
* The Cobbler
* The Forger
* The Gallows
* The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence)
* United Passions
* Unsullied
* Vacation
* War Room
So with all those thankful misses out of the way, let's do the dishonorable mentions aka the 5 films that just lucked out of being in the Top 20 worst in alphabetical order.
And we start off with a zombie film that was boring as fuck. A virus turns people into zombies so people think that if they go to a snow-covered town, they are safe because if they do...the zombies will freeze to death. But as you know, these zombies somehow evolve in an attempt to survive the cold, which I could say no shit that was going to happen. But that of course happens in the beginning and the zombies are in the background as we talk more about these two men (played by Matthew Fox and Jeffrey Donovan) who are brothers and are dealing with raising a daughter of one of their dead wives. And of course their is a bullshit twist involving who the father of this girl is that makes you just act like "Really, movie?"
I heard a lot of praise for fans of Asian horror, but with a bad reception and a bad grade from IMDB, I just was curious to see if it was good or bad.....and it was pretty fucking bad. The acting is fucking terrible and it gets even worse when the villain of this film (who barely appears) attempts to be the head Voltaire Aro from the Twilight series. This film tries to make up for this bad acting and terrible script with nudity and gore including a naked woman hiding guns in her breasts and bullets in her legs. In the middle before the final scenes, we get loads and loads of torture porn as this teacher tries to train this girl (who he abducted) to help him get revenge for the death of his wife who the villain killed and then fucked afterwards (because he is a necrophilia rapist). Just a poor Japanese erotic action film.
The worst DC animated film I have ever seen. The characters in this film are all completely unlikable and moronic. The villain is a whiny bitch who is sad that is father died and wants to take it out on the surface world, even though the guy responsible for his father's death due causing to an underwater volcano eruption was killed in the last movie. Oh and even worse, his mother who is against this world tells him this and he still says the surface world is still responsible even though like mentioned, the guy who killed his father was against the surface world. The bullshit that this villain does to start this shit is just mind boggling. Black Manta (a villain who is sorta working with the main villain, but has an objective of his own) reveals his ulterior plans and then gets eaten by a shark like a bitch. Man, you would think he was Samuel L. Jackson from Deep Blue Sea. And the good guys, they are beyond useless. If this is what the New 52 comics are like, count me out.
Olivia Wilde deserves way better than this stupid film that commits one of the biggest sins in trying to act intelligent. Basically, Olivia's character gets accidentally killed in a failed experiment where they try to bring back the dead so of course, scientist dumbass decides to bring her back to life because she was his love interest. But it turns out that you really shouldn't bring back someone from the dead, especially when that person turns out to have killed someone. Yep....Olivia Wilde comes back as a demon and starts killing everyone. Despite all the mistakes, the scientists still try to fix it instead of killing her until they have no choice but to try and kill her. I really hate when a film is stupid and then tries to be smart and preach at the same fucking time.
A direct to DVD film that rips off the plot of Westworld, but sleazy. Could be a good idea where a company creates clones in a virtual world for people to do whatever they want to them (like murder) and be brought back the next day as if nothing happened. Someone who has a conscience for these clones decides to give one of them memory of their past so the clone goes on a journey to attempt to get the other clones to realize what has been going on. Both Thomas Jane and Bruce Willis are obviously doing this for a paycheck and don't even try. Ambyr Childers, the woman who they try to make this film about, is way out of her element in this film. Honestly, I would rather watch Westworld than this sanctimonious pile of garbage. Bottom line is Bruce Willis needs to not be in these direct to DVD films and if he is, don't be one of the reasons these films suck.
Now it is time to start revealing the 20 films of this year that I am not going to recommend to anyone.
This film took four years to be released and it is definitely one of those that have had these release problems because the film isn't that good. It's a murder mystery where every suspect is an unlikable douche who deserves to be busted by their wives. Yeah, this whole loft is basically where the 5 of them can take their mistresses so they can have sex with them. One of the things that is supposed to make a sleazy film is the women (even the mistresses) are supposed to be somewhat attractive and none of them are. And the ending....well, a few of them are actually rewarded for their transgressions, only one of them goes to jail, and only one of them is dead. This is a male fantasy that ultimately can't even satisfy most of the male viewers because of how boring it is and how despicable it is. Hopefully, most men aren't like any of these douchebags.
Oh dear god...this film really needed John Cusack to return as the straight man. Otherwise, you get every character (including the one they try to replace him with) be annoying in their despicability. I cannot fathom the same writer and director from the first one, made this film. This is the perfect example of a film that never should have had a sequel as everyone learns their lesson at the end of the first one, but since the first one did well....a sequel was required. Oh and this film seems to have wanted their to be a third film, but it doesn't look like their will be one as this film bombed at the box office. The only moment that kind of got me a laugh was Christian Slater hosting the most disgusting game show ever.
The original Pact was actually a surprising film for me as I didn't hear great things about it, but it was actually good in my mind and I actually liked the twist. The first one makes you think their is a supernatural evil force out there, but the supernatural force turns out to be good and someone who is still alive is the monster. So what does the sequel do? The killer who dies in the first movie is teased to be the supernatural killer and the character that we rooted for in the first film to survive this film, is killed off for a character, who is acted by someone not as good. Also we get someone being a copycat killer, who is only doing this because the killer wants him to convince his girlfriend to continue his killings. And then we get a stupid ass ending that tries to set up a third film, but I hope to god that NEVER happens. Just leave well enough alone.
17. Hangar 10
This is going to be the first of several found footage movies that will be on this list because sadly, found footage movies these days need to get the most unlikable actors out there. If you have seen the poster, you should know the funniest thing to note which is the lead character is a enthusiast for metal detectors, but he is a guy who basically is very unbelieving of supernatural stuff and makes up the worst explanations for when things happen. Then we have the videographer friend of his girlfriend be a complete douche who gets them all caught up in going to this area of an actual incident so all the bad shit that happens to them is this fucker's fault (he also bought military weapons illegally as well so fuck this guy). Then we have the girlfriend who is just freaking there. This movie was boring and at the end, it got freaking annoying with the damn sounds. I don't plan on ever seeing this movie again and this may also be one of the few movies that I had to look up to remember what happened.
16. The Last House On Cemetery Lane
Unlike The Pact, this is a movie that fails with the idea of supernatural being, but live person is a killer. This film is so freaking textbook and you could tell every twist before it freaking happens. The acting is terrible and the script is just booooring. Every moment of this film, I found myself looking at my watch waiting for when the next shit happens. And the main character knew there was a woman upstairs as the retailer told him that, but he thinks NOTHING of this whole thing even though that lady is suspicious as fuck. I'm sorry, but if you want to get out of the big city so you can have peace and quiet, the LAST thing you are going to do is buy a house with someone else living in it as well, even if the retailer says they won't bother you. The love story is forced and the whole film is proved pointless as despite what happens, nothing changes.
15. Woman in Black 2: Angel of Death
I was coaxed into watching this movie by someone who liked the first Woman in Black film (despite the fact I told her that film was a remake and the real original was better) because hey, I like horror. I'm going to get this out of the way right now, this film BORED the piss out of me. It used jump scares way too much and all of them jump scares did was keep me from falling completely asleep due to the damn noise. Not once was I scared of this woman in black nor did I care what the hell happened as none of the characters are interesting whatsoever. Oh, I should be concerned about the kids in the film getting killed....no. The kids that got killed were complete bullies and got what was coming to them. And the dumbest thing, they decide to tell the same Woman in Black backstory again as if it is something new. Just don't watch this bore....even if you somehow like the first one like the person who coaxed me into watching this did.
14. Pixies
Well, it is time for my most hated animated film of 2015. Writer/Director/Producer/Star of this film Sean Patrick O'Reilly tries to cheaply make a cash-in animated film. And surprisingly, he is able to get some famous people to voice this film like Oscar Winner Christopher Plummer, Alexa Vega (who really is in this as her husband Carlos PenaVega is in it as well) and Bill Paxton. The animation in this is beyond terrible and the script for this film is just insulting. I am going to quote a line that was made in the final act of this film right here so here it is. "This is going to go viral. No, better...this is going to go anti-biotic." Yes, that is a line in this piece of shit movie. Despite what Stan Lee says, do not watch this unless you are someone who reviews shitty animated movies (looking at you Raymond Gallant at Toon Crap. Cheap plug)
13. The Coven
This is one of those films where every character is irritating as all hell. Basically some teenage girls go to the woods on Halloween because they were told about this story of a group of Wiccans disappearing years ago. Basically they learn some of the most stupid reveals ever like the first letter in their first names all spell LUCIFER. Oh and the teacher that told them this tale has the name of Mrs. Belial, which should have been the least bit suspicious. Yeah, turns out Mrs. Belial is evil (what a shock?) and the dumbass teens are there because the devil needs more people in hell (I'm not kidding). Oh and the nursery rhyme is stupid so of course they keep doing it. I really don't think I can talk more about this film without watching it again and fuck that shit.
12. Ghoul
A found footage movie from the Czech Republic (the second found footage movie not from the US as Hangar 10 was made in the UK). Ghoul is about a group of Americans who come to the Czech Republic because of stories of widespread cannibalism that happened during the famine in the 1930s. They decide they want to do some séances with some very shady characters around and of course summon the spirit of a cannibal. Basically this film really has no idea what it wants to be about and the final product shows the complete confusion. Every Czech actor they have in this film acts completely out there and it just gets to the point where you are just telling these characters to go somewhere else for your story. Of course they don't and you just face palm your head when they do the séance and now they can't escape. Many of these found footage movies really were on the boring side and this was one of them, when they aren't doing something that insults the audience intelligence.
I was coaxed into watching this movie by someone who liked the first Woman in Black film (despite the fact I told her that film was a remake and the real original was better) because hey, I like horror. I'm going to get this out of the way right now, this film BORED the piss out of me. It used jump scares way too much and all of them jump scares did was keep me from falling completely asleep due to the damn noise. Not once was I scared of this woman in black nor did I care what the hell happened as none of the characters are interesting whatsoever. Oh, I should be concerned about the kids in the film getting killed....no. The kids that got killed were complete bullies and got what was coming to them. And the dumbest thing, they decide to tell the same Woman in Black backstory again as if it is something new. Just don't watch this bore....even if you somehow like the first one like the person who coaxed me into watching this did.
Well, it is time for my most hated animated film of 2015. Writer/Director/Producer/Star of this film Sean Patrick O'Reilly tries to cheaply make a cash-in animated film. And surprisingly, he is able to get some famous people to voice this film like Oscar Winner Christopher Plummer, Alexa Vega (who really is in this as her husband Carlos PenaVega is in it as well) and Bill Paxton. The animation in this is beyond terrible and the script for this film is just insulting. I am going to quote a line that was made in the final act of this film right here so here it is. "This is going to go viral. No, better...this is going to go anti-biotic." Yes, that is a line in this piece of shit movie. Despite what Stan Lee says, do not watch this unless you are someone who reviews shitty animated movies (looking at you Raymond Gallant at Toon Crap. Cheap plug)
This is one of those films where every character is irritating as all hell. Basically some teenage girls go to the woods on Halloween because they were told about this story of a group of Wiccans disappearing years ago. Basically they learn some of the most stupid reveals ever like the first letter in their first names all spell LUCIFER. Oh and the teacher that told them this tale has the name of Mrs. Belial, which should have been the least bit suspicious. Yeah, turns out Mrs. Belial is evil (what a shock?) and the dumbass teens are there because the devil needs more people in hell (I'm not kidding). Oh and the nursery rhyme is stupid so of course they keep doing it. I really don't think I can talk more about this film without watching it again and fuck that shit.
A found footage movie from the Czech Republic (the second found footage movie not from the US as Hangar 10 was made in the UK). Ghoul is about a group of Americans who come to the Czech Republic because of stories of widespread cannibalism that happened during the famine in the 1930s. They decide they want to do some séances with some very shady characters around and of course summon the spirit of a cannibal. Basically this film really has no idea what it wants to be about and the final product shows the complete confusion. Every Czech actor they have in this film acts completely out there and it just gets to the point where you are just telling these characters to go somewhere else for your story. Of course they don't and you just face palm your head when they do the séance and now they can't escape. Many of these found footage movies really were on the boring side and this was one of them, when they aren't doing something that insults the audience intelligence.
11. Devil's Backbone, Texas
This film was directed by the son of the guy who went on Unsolved Mysteries and talked about his property known as Devil's Backbone being a bit haunted. So what does his son do, try to rip off Blair Witch Project and have the character who plays his son (because the actual son would rather direct) disrespect his dad in every way possible, calling his dad mental and basically saying he was an embarrassment. Heck, in the story, this son is doing this film so he can disprove his dad's stories. So of course fictionally, this thing does exist and thankfully the characters get fucked. But truthfully, I found this whole boring film to be extremely exploitive of something his old man went to his grave believing. Maybe I am wrong and the guy wanted to really keep his dad's beliefs alive, but that wasn't the way I saw it.
10. Archivo 253
Dear god....this was the worst of the foreign found footage films. This film was so boring with so much bullshit going on. All of the characters are definately "amateur". In fact, the whole film was made amateurish. The dialogue was beyond atrocious and if you have a red-green color blindness, you are fucked because most of this film is in green "night-light" filter. I swear to god that several times in this film, I had to rewind this because something happened and I have no idea what and then had to rewind it again because it still made no fucking sense. You can of course find it on Netflix, but you better get your caffeine ready because this film is going to test your patience with useless shit. I should name this film the worst of the year, but I am not going to give this film the satisfaction of being that. Instead, it is going to stay at 10 because hopefully, that will keep this film from being watched for curiosity reasons.
9. Pixels
Adam Sandler and friends screw up arcade games. You have some of the most insulting casting, like Kevin James playing the president (who can't read). You have Adam Sandler playing the Gary Stu character that he always does. He is obnoxious as hell and still gets the girl in the end. You have Josh Gad be just.....disgusting. And oh lord help me, the things they get wrong on old video games makes me believe that this cast and crew have never played video games in their goddamn lives. If you want to see this premise, done well.....go watch the Futurama episode that is based on this very idea. And while we could get Matt Frewer to return as Max Headroom for one scene, we couldn't get the real Toru Iwatami to help them against Pac-Man. Sad thing is while this film gets plenty of Razzie nominations, it is NOT the worst film Sandler and friends have done this year.
8. Poltergeist (remake)
The original film is a terrifying film that uses slight of hand tricks, practical effects, and anticipation for its scares while this remake use CGI and jump scares for its scares. It's almost a complete copy and paste remake except instead of a family we hope survives, we get completely grating characters; and instead of effects that you can see are there, you get CGI that you know the people are just reacting to nothing. Unfortunately, this film made its budget back so the studio will somewhat consider this film a success. I wish I liked this film like I did the original because finding a good remake out of all the crap these days is like finding a diamond in a mound of shit, but this is not that diamond and instead is just another lump of shit.
7. The Culling
Can we just eliminate that word from existence because NOTHING that ever comes out of that is entertaining in any way? No? Shit...well, let's just get to this film. A bunch of teens going on a road trip and are hungry so they go into town, where they are upset that a local restaurant has the temerity to close when they should close. So somehow they find a lost girl and try to do one honorable thing in getting her home, but instead of getting her home and just leaving (because their job is done), they stay because the parents aren't home and then they still stay even when the parents come home, instead of getting to a show that they are desperate to get to on time. Of course the girl turns out to be evil and we get CGI black smoke that looks freaking awful. Thankfully, that's all I remember about this film because if I remembered any more, this film might be even higher (or in the case of this list, lower) on my list. Moving on...
6. The Chosen
You know, when the star you have chosen to advertise for this crap film is just a YouTube personality, you know you are in deep trouble. Sad thing is, this film had a GREAT idea that could be done seriously as a malevolent spirit has haunted a child and the only way to get this spirit from taking away the child is to offer it a replacement of 5 souls from your bloodline. Yes, you have to sacrifice 5 people in your own family to end the curse on someone who you know is totally innocent and only got cursed because of bad fucking luck. But unfortunately, this film has terrible acting and once again, the CGI is bloody awful. I hate having to put films that have potential (and a lot of it) in my bottom list, but this film squanders that much of its potential and just makes for something god awful.
5. Robot Overlords
Sadly, this is going to be a multi-media franchise because if this film is any indication, this should end right here. Yes, they got a shit ton of money to get Sir Ben Kingsley and Gillian Anderson to have their names attached to this, but they also have not enough money for good teenage actors and good CGI as the other stars suck and the CGI for the robots are bad. Basically, robots of some alien civilization have taken over Earth and they ask (with the fakest child I have ever seen (even though it's a real kid)) that the earthlings just stay indoors at night, but of course they just want all the Earthlings knowledge (which they will kill for) and some stupid ass kid somehow gets unexplained powers that control the robots. This movie is full of so many deus ex machine crap, a bad script, and bad acting from everyone but the two people who are famous, that I cannot enjoy this film. Please England, do not make any more of these films.
4. Roboshark
This is one of the worst "Made for SyFy" movies I have seen in years. It initially sounds fine, but the characters and the actors playing this kills this fucking movie. There are so many times where I yelled at this movie "why are you doing this" or "that wouldn't happen". Instead of interesting characters, we get every character talking about twitter, facebook, instagram, and every other stupid internet lingo in imagination. One of the most facepalming moments is the revelation that Roboshark has a twitter page that is following the teen girl hacker character and that is how they can communicate with the monster. Our main female character is a person who is forced to be a weatherperson who is forced to wear stupid get-ups while doing the weather to embarrass herself. Let me explain a few things...no news station would do that shit because 1) it would get old and 2) no person who actually is a proper news person would do that. There is more stupid shit, but we have other films to get to so let me just say: fuck this movie.
3. The Walking Deceased
If you think Seltzer/Friedberg are the worst when it comes to parody movies, see a movie like this. This is of course a parody of the Walking Dead TV Show, with for some reason parodies of Shawn of the Dead and the forgettable Warm Bodies. We have the main character who gets in a coma because his son accidentally hit him with a baseball and he is completely moronic while trying to stay gruff which all it does is irritate me when he talks. The son who caused the coma starts running a strip club with his mom as one of the strippers after the zombie apocalypse occurs. He is so moronic that he plenty of times he mistakes people who are fine for zombies and kills them (causing plenty of PCD: Pointless Child Death). He even kills people who have turned normal after being cured of the zombie plague because he is that fucking stupid and yes, he is still their leader. Oh and the biggest slap in the face, the cure is in the water so they squirt people with water and they are cured. This was for a month the worst movie I've seen, but then I saw #1 and that changed it.
2. The Ridiculous 6
Yes, this is the worse Adam Sandler film that I was talking about. I remember hearing about this and originally wanting to pass, but then my friend talked about it and he said he couldn't get passed 10 minutes so being the movie masochist that I am and a person who actually likes westerns, I decided to give it a view. Well, I saw the whole thing and my friend can sleep at night knowing that the movie doesn't get any better after the first 10 minutes. Adam Sandler plays a white guy who has been raised by Native Americans and he is made a Gary Stu character (of course) who has mystical powers that he can grab out of his ass. Rob Schneider plays a half Mexican who has a donkey (his burro) that does shit jokes and we have several stunt casting to insulting parody famous people from the late 1800s that go longer than they should be. There is a scene with Abner Doubleday that takes dear god.......I don't know how long, but I was on my knees, begging this shit to end as it more than wasted its welcome and I was ecstatic when it finally ended. You want to see Adam Sandler and his friends give less of a shit for a movie, go watch this.......actually, fuck that. Don't watch this movie under any circumstances and the fact this movie got the most views of Netflix history is sad.
1. Beyond
For every movie that has been shown here and bashed upon, there is one thing they all do better than #1. When they say something is going to happen, they do at least once show it happening. This movie says that an alien invasion is occurring and not once do you ever see the aliens or even the spaceship they are invading on (no idea where they got that spaceship on the poster from). Instead, we get a terrible love story that is the focus. The actors in this film are not that good of course and you are just yelling at this film to show, not tell with the aliens. In fact, here is how this works....there are scenes where the aliens are attacking earth, but we only see the characters tell us what happens and relationship that has fallen off (even though we never know what happens). We get someone explaining they are talking to the aliens over the radio, but all we here is fucking static so we know this person who is "talking to the aliens" is just nuts. And in the ultimate kick to the balls, the whole strained relationship and aliens invading....it is all just a dream of the main character because at some point, he got shot by his friend who turns on him. I wish I was making all of this up, but that is what happens with this film and thus I am forced to make it #1 for that reason.
Well, now that I have named the worst films I have seen in 2015, I think it is time for me to say that I am going to see a film that I didn't see yet, but it is the film plenty of you saw and because of that, it is the 2015 GINO Award Winner so next time we do this, we will be doing our first induction of 2016, which will be....
Dear god....this was the worst of the foreign found footage films. This film was so boring with so much bullshit going on. All of the characters are definately "amateur". In fact, the whole film was made amateurish. The dialogue was beyond atrocious and if you have a red-green color blindness, you are fucked because most of this film is in green "night-light" filter. I swear to god that several times in this film, I had to rewind this because something happened and I have no idea what and then had to rewind it again because it still made no fucking sense. You can of course find it on Netflix, but you better get your caffeine ready because this film is going to test your patience with useless shit. I should name this film the worst of the year, but I am not going to give this film the satisfaction of being that. Instead, it is going to stay at 10 because hopefully, that will keep this film from being watched for curiosity reasons.
Adam Sandler and friends screw up arcade games. You have some of the most insulting casting, like Kevin James playing the president (who can't read). You have Adam Sandler playing the Gary Stu character that he always does. He is obnoxious as hell and still gets the girl in the end. You have Josh Gad be just.....disgusting. And oh lord help me, the things they get wrong on old video games makes me believe that this cast and crew have never played video games in their goddamn lives. If you want to see this premise, done well.....go watch the Futurama episode that is based on this very idea. And while we could get Matt Frewer to return as Max Headroom for one scene, we couldn't get the real Toru Iwatami to help them against Pac-Man. Sad thing is while this film gets plenty of Razzie nominations, it is NOT the worst film Sandler and friends have done this year.
The original film is a terrifying film that uses slight of hand tricks, practical effects, and anticipation for its scares while this remake use CGI and jump scares for its scares. It's almost a complete copy and paste remake except instead of a family we hope survives, we get completely grating characters; and instead of effects that you can see are there, you get CGI that you know the people are just reacting to nothing. Unfortunately, this film made its budget back so the studio will somewhat consider this film a success. I wish I liked this film like I did the original because finding a good remake out of all the crap these days is like finding a diamond in a mound of shit, but this is not that diamond and instead is just another lump of shit.
Can we just eliminate that word from existence because NOTHING that ever comes out of that is entertaining in any way? No? Shit...well, let's just get to this film. A bunch of teens going on a road trip and are hungry so they go into town, where they are upset that a local restaurant has the temerity to close when they should close. So somehow they find a lost girl and try to do one honorable thing in getting her home, but instead of getting her home and just leaving (because their job is done), they stay because the parents aren't home and then they still stay even when the parents come home, instead of getting to a show that they are desperate to get to on time. Of course the girl turns out to be evil and we get CGI black smoke that looks freaking awful. Thankfully, that's all I remember about this film because if I remembered any more, this film might be even higher (or in the case of this list, lower) on my list. Moving on...
You know, when the star you have chosen to advertise for this crap film is just a YouTube personality, you know you are in deep trouble. Sad thing is, this film had a GREAT idea that could be done seriously as a malevolent spirit has haunted a child and the only way to get this spirit from taking away the child is to offer it a replacement of 5 souls from your bloodline. Yes, you have to sacrifice 5 people in your own family to end the curse on someone who you know is totally innocent and only got cursed because of bad fucking luck. But unfortunately, this film has terrible acting and once again, the CGI is bloody awful. I hate having to put films that have potential (and a lot of it) in my bottom list, but this film squanders that much of its potential and just makes for something god awful.
Sadly, this is going to be a multi-media franchise because if this film is any indication, this should end right here. Yes, they got a shit ton of money to get Sir Ben Kingsley and Gillian Anderson to have their names attached to this, but they also have not enough money for good teenage actors and good CGI as the other stars suck and the CGI for the robots are bad. Basically, robots of some alien civilization have taken over Earth and they ask (with the fakest child I have ever seen (even though it's a real kid)) that the earthlings just stay indoors at night, but of course they just want all the Earthlings knowledge (which they will kill for) and some stupid ass kid somehow gets unexplained powers that control the robots. This movie is full of so many deus ex machine crap, a bad script, and bad acting from everyone but the two people who are famous, that I cannot enjoy this film. Please England, do not make any more of these films.
This is one of the worst "Made for SyFy" movies I have seen in years. It initially sounds fine, but the characters and the actors playing this kills this fucking movie. There are so many times where I yelled at this movie "why are you doing this" or "that wouldn't happen". Instead of interesting characters, we get every character talking about twitter, facebook, instagram, and every other stupid internet lingo in imagination. One of the most facepalming moments is the revelation that Roboshark has a twitter page that is following the teen girl hacker character and that is how they can communicate with the monster. Our main female character is a person who is forced to be a weatherperson who is forced to wear stupid get-ups while doing the weather to embarrass herself. Let me explain a few things...no news station would do that shit because 1) it would get old and 2) no person who actually is a proper news person would do that. There is more stupid shit, but we have other films to get to so let me just say: fuck this movie.
If you think Seltzer/Friedberg are the worst when it comes to parody movies, see a movie like this. This is of course a parody of the Walking Dead TV Show, with for some reason parodies of Shawn of the Dead and the forgettable Warm Bodies. We have the main character who gets in a coma because his son accidentally hit him with a baseball and he is completely moronic while trying to stay gruff which all it does is irritate me when he talks. The son who caused the coma starts running a strip club with his mom as one of the strippers after the zombie apocalypse occurs. He is so moronic that he plenty of times he mistakes people who are fine for zombies and kills them (causing plenty of PCD: Pointless Child Death). He even kills people who have turned normal after being cured of the zombie plague because he is that fucking stupid and yes, he is still their leader. Oh and the biggest slap in the face, the cure is in the water so they squirt people with water and they are cured. This was for a month the worst movie I've seen, but then I saw #1 and that changed it.
Yes, this is the worse Adam Sandler film that I was talking about. I remember hearing about this and originally wanting to pass, but then my friend talked about it and he said he couldn't get passed 10 minutes so being the movie masochist that I am and a person who actually likes westerns, I decided to give it a view. Well, I saw the whole thing and my friend can sleep at night knowing that the movie doesn't get any better after the first 10 minutes. Adam Sandler plays a white guy who has been raised by Native Americans and he is made a Gary Stu character (of course) who has mystical powers that he can grab out of his ass. Rob Schneider plays a half Mexican who has a donkey (his burro) that does shit jokes and we have several stunt casting to insulting parody famous people from the late 1800s that go longer than they should be. There is a scene with Abner Doubleday that takes dear god.......I don't know how long, but I was on my knees, begging this shit to end as it more than wasted its welcome and I was ecstatic when it finally ended. You want to see Adam Sandler and his friends give less of a shit for a movie, go watch this.......actually, fuck that. Don't watch this movie under any circumstances and the fact this movie got the most views of Netflix history is sad.
For every movie that has been shown here and bashed upon, there is one thing they all do better than #1. When they say something is going to happen, they do at least once show it happening. This movie says that an alien invasion is occurring and not once do you ever see the aliens or even the spaceship they are invading on (no idea where they got that spaceship on the poster from). Instead, we get a terrible love story that is the focus. The actors in this film are not that good of course and you are just yelling at this film to show, not tell with the aliens. In fact, here is how this works....there are scenes where the aliens are attacking earth, but we only see the characters tell us what happens and relationship that has fallen off (even though we never know what happens). We get someone explaining they are talking to the aliens over the radio, but all we here is fucking static so we know this person who is "talking to the aliens" is just nuts. And in the ultimate kick to the balls, the whole strained relationship and aliens invading....it is all just a dream of the main character because at some point, he got shot by his friend who turns on him. I wish I was making all of this up, but that is what happens with this film and thus I am forced to make it #1 for that reason.
Well, now that I have named the worst films I have seen in 2015, I think it is time for me to say that I am going to see a film that I didn't see yet, but it is the film plenty of you saw and because of that, it is the 2015 GINO Award Winner so next time we do this, we will be doing our first induction of 2016, which will be....
Wednesday, January 13, 2016
Seth & Mike's Impact Implosion for January 12th, 2016
A better Impact show than last week....but you may not notice that with the rant on what happened on the tapings (yes, I do spoil something), the mediocre One Night Only: Live recap, and us having to deal with the mind numbingly bad Mr. Anderson talk show called "Huh?" (despite what FK says, that is a terrible freaking name). The good stuff involves a great Kurt Angle vs. Drew Galloway match and a fun beer bash with Bobby Roode and James Storm.
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My Top 20 Favorite Films of 2015
Well, we can call 2015 a done year and unlike 2014, it was not a great year for movies...although personally it was a better year than last year on everything else. So as with anyone who watches movies and reviews as a hobby, I have compiled my best of and worst of list and like everyone, I first am going to reveal my Top 20 Favorite Films of 2015.
Now before I begin with honorable mentions, here are a few films that are given good reviews, but I have not seen.
* 45 Years
* Anomalisa
* Bridge of Spies
* Brooklyn
* Carol
* Chi-Raq
* Creed
* Dragonball Z: Resurrection 'F'
* I Am Chris Farley
* Room
* Sicario
* Son of Saul
* Spectre
* Spotlight
* Steve Jobs
* The Assassin
* The Big Short
* The Hateful Eight
* The Martian
* Trainwreck
* Trumbo
So let's start with honorable mentions and before anyone asks, no....there will be no Marvel movies this year as neither one was liked enough for me to put on even the honorable mentions. These Honorable Mentions of course will be in alphabetical order.
Beasts of No Nation
A very heart wrenching tale of a kid in a fictional African country who has to deal with civil war that has separated him from his mom and younger kids while a misunderstanding thanks to a bitchy woman (who never gets her comeuppance) causes the death of his father and older brother at the hands of the government forces. He ends up as a member of this rebel force who slaughter plenty of innocents and their leader The Commandant is a persuasive leader who is not so great himself. In the end, he knows what he is ultimately doing is wrong, but he is doing so because he is following orders and as a child, it is a lot harder to differentiate what is right and wrong.
Jurassic World
I know this movie has gotten a lot of criticism by people for characters, effects, and the script. But I enjoyed this film more than I did either Marvel films and a few more films. I liked Chris Pratt's character and the whole world of Jurassic World was great with all the dinosaurs look good (I didn't see the CGI problems other people did). The T-Rex reveal was awesome and yes, the deaths were great as well. I saw this film in 3D and I enjoyed the 3D.
Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation
This time IMF has to take on a secret organization known as the Syndicate while running afoul of the CIA. This is a good film as all of the Mission Impossible films have been (except 2), but it is not a great film, despite hearing plenty of hype. Sean Harris plays a rather forgettable villain and the femme fetale character in Ilsa Faust was merely just okay. Also Simon Pegg was not as funny as he normally is in these films and Jeremy Renner is rarely used. However, the film is very creative with the weapons and the fight scenes are great. Also Ving Rhames and Tom Cruise are as good as they usually are.
Spy
Okay, yes...I am not a huge Melissa McCarthy fan and the typecasted roles she usually gets annoy me like hell. However, this is a film that was perfect for her and the cast around her was able to make up for even Melissa's shortcomings. This is perfect as a parody of spy films (and knowing what parodies I am used to, is sadly a hard thing these days). The reason this is not in my Top 20: 20 more films I sort of enjoyed more and yeah, there were some Melissa McCarthy moments that bugged me.
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Now before I begin with honorable mentions, here are a few films that are given good reviews, but I have not seen.
* 45 Years
* Anomalisa
* Bridge of Spies
* Brooklyn
* Carol
* Chi-Raq
* Creed
* Dragonball Z: Resurrection 'F'
* I Am Chris Farley
* Room
* Sicario
* Son of Saul
* Spectre
* Spotlight
* Steve Jobs
* The Assassin
* The Big Short
* The Hateful Eight
* The Martian
* Trainwreck
* Trumbo
So let's start with honorable mentions and before anyone asks, no....there will be no Marvel movies this year as neither one was liked enough for me to put on even the honorable mentions. These Honorable Mentions of course will be in alphabetical order.
A very heart wrenching tale of a kid in a fictional African country who has to deal with civil war that has separated him from his mom and younger kids while a misunderstanding thanks to a bitchy woman (who never gets her comeuppance) causes the death of his father and older brother at the hands of the government forces. He ends up as a member of this rebel force who slaughter plenty of innocents and their leader The Commandant is a persuasive leader who is not so great himself. In the end, he knows what he is ultimately doing is wrong, but he is doing so because he is following orders and as a child, it is a lot harder to differentiate what is right and wrong.
I know this movie has gotten a lot of criticism by people for characters, effects, and the script. But I enjoyed this film more than I did either Marvel films and a few more films. I liked Chris Pratt's character and the whole world of Jurassic World was great with all the dinosaurs look good (I didn't see the CGI problems other people did). The T-Rex reveal was awesome and yes, the deaths were great as well. I saw this film in 3D and I enjoyed the 3D.
This time IMF has to take on a secret organization known as the Syndicate while running afoul of the CIA. This is a good film as all of the Mission Impossible films have been (except 2), but it is not a great film, despite hearing plenty of hype. Sean Harris plays a rather forgettable villain and the femme fetale character in Ilsa Faust was merely just okay. Also Simon Pegg was not as funny as he normally is in these films and Jeremy Renner is rarely used. However, the film is very creative with the weapons and the fight scenes are great. Also Ving Rhames and Tom Cruise are as good as they usually are.
Okay, yes...I am not a huge Melissa McCarthy fan and the typecasted roles she usually gets annoy me like hell. However, this is a film that was perfect for her and the cast around her was able to make up for even Melissa's shortcomings. This is perfect as a parody of spy films (and knowing what parodies I am used to, is sadly a hard thing these days). The reason this is not in my Top 20: 20 more films I sort of enjoyed more and yeah, there were some Melissa McCarthy moments that bugged me.
The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie: Sponge Out Of Water
I'm not a huge SpongeBob SquarePants fan, but even I can laugh at this film. For the first time, we get to see the SpongeBob characters be in the real world as they battle against BurgerBeard, who is played by Antonio Banderas who you can tell is having fun with the role. There were plenty of references to other movies and the jokes are funny. The only thing that doesn't put this in my Top 20 is well, it is a kids movie and the whole reason for BurgerBeard getting the Krabby Patty recipe seems rather contrived.
So now that those are out of the way, time for the Top 20 Favorite Films of 2015 and I would like to mention once again that these films had to be released for many audiences in the UNITED STATES in 2015. They can be released in other countries earlier and heck, can be released in this country in a film festival, but I don't count those as the year of release for me. So if you see films on this list and say that film was released earlier, remember what I said and that will be why they are on this list.
20. Into The Grizzly Maze
One of those rare exceptions of a film that had been on the shelf for years (3 exactly) actually being an enjoying film. This cast was really awesome and I'll be honest, I love a killer bear movie. In fact, I believe there has only been one killer bear movie that I did not like in some kind of way (that being 2010's Bear). Bart The Bear 2 gets to be the killer bear in this movie (as opposed to CGI in a movie that will also be on this list later) and we get to see good to great actors really be scared by this bear. In fact, this movie was at one time called Grizzly and I would have been fine with this film being considered a remake to the 1970s killer bear movie that I inducted onto Monster Crap. James Marsden and Thomas Jane play believable brothers and you want these two to survive against this bear who ultimately is at the point of no return since her cub was killed in the beginning by hunters (those hunters got killer early).
19. These Final Hours
One of four films from Australia that made this list, These Final Hours actually has a different approach to how to do a movie where it's said in the beginning that everyone is going to die. Unlike most movies, where you see chaos and some heroic attempt to save us all, this film just is more passive about it and says "You know, what...it is the end so actually make your last hours on Earth count instead of trying to prolong the inevitable." The comet has hit Earth and instead of just destroying the planet, hit has created a fiery cloud that is slowly going to incinerate everyone when it passes over them. Our main character has a fiancée and someone he sees on the side so immediately you may not like this guy, but the more and more he goes on this film (and also tries to get a girl to her parents since the girl wants to spend her final moments with her family), our main character realizes that he may actually be more in love with the woman who he has seen on the side (and has gotten pregnant) so instead of spending his final hours of wanting to spend his final hours in debauchery like his fiancée wants to do (along with her brother and her girlfriend), this guy wants to spend it with the one he truly loves watching as the fiery clouds come to incinerate them.
18. Mr. Holmes
I watched this film with my mom, aunt, and cousin...and despite missing the first few minutes, I found myself engaged to this film that features a masterful performance by Sir Ian McKellan as Sherlock Holmes. Now you may look at the picture on the cover and say, that's not the Sherlock Holmes I have read in the books and you would be correct as this is supposed to be the Sherlock Holmes who was behind the books (which were written by Watson and sold to Sir Arthur Conan Doyle). As you watch this film, you see that there are part of the Sherlock Holmes mythos from the books that he finds fraudulent and yet there are ways he acts that makes you believe that he is Sherlock. Laura Linney is also in this film as a housekeeper and mother of a boy who adores Sherlock's methods. He also takes in his hobby of beekeeping (even though we learn the boy is allergic to bees). The interactions between these characters really actually is able to overshadow the mystery that this film also tells as Sherlock is trying to write a memoir about a case he believes that he failed.
17. Ex Machina
An actor who had a great 2015 would be son of actor Brendan Gleeson, Domhall Gleeson, as he is in three films that are on this list. Not far behind him is Oscar Isaacs (who just won a Golden Globe) and has been in two films on this list (both with Gleeson ironically). But I am just padding this review so let's get into the film itself. This is a film that really makes you think about whether sometimes we may be less human than the robots we create. Gleeson plays a kid who has won a trip to see his illusive boss (played by Isaacs) in his special penthouse so he can be part of a sort of Turing Test between Gleeson's character and a woman who is actually a robot (she looks and acts mostly like a human, except for the huge parts that you can see are robotic). As the film moves along, you start to realize not everything is as it seems. I have to see the effects in combining human features with robotic features is freaking outstanding (and at times extremely unsettling) and definitely worthy of at least an Oscar nomination for Best Visual Effects.
16. The Gift
Joel Edgarton's directorial debut is this completely one of the creepiest and most unsettling films you will see this year. It does the rare thing in making two actors be completely opposites of what they look like in real life with Joel Edgarton (remember this guy played a teacher turned fighter who tapped people out) into a diminutive creep who is that way due to years of bullying and Jason freaking Bateman (yes, the guy who stars in Arrested Development and the guy who you probably would think you could take in a fight) be this man who you think may be a nice guy, but as the film goes along, you realizes this guy is a lying piece of shit bully. And the gift that Joel Edgarton's character has for Jason Bateman's character, who is married to Rebecca Hall's character is just too jaw dropping and horrifying on a mental level for me to even spoil.
15. Love & Mercy
This film dealing with the life of Brian Wilson from the Beach Boys was really touching with Paul Dano playing the younger Brian Wilson and John Cusack playing the older Brian Wilson. You pretty much got to see the strange things that go into the mind of Brian Wilson along with abuse from his father and his psychiatrist later on. You got to see true love between John Cusack's older Brian Wilson and Elizabeth Bank's Melinda Bedletter and you really got to see how just bad and abusive Dr. Landy (played by Paul Giamatti was with his therapy. It is a wonderful film that I would recommend anyone seeing, especially if you are a fan of Brian Wilson or the Beach Boys.
14. Krampus
A Christmas horror movie from the guy who did Trick R' Treat? Count me in. This film that takes a miserable family and makes some of them somewhat likable when they are faced with the titular creature who punishes those who don't believe in Christmas anymore. The effects in the film are great and the acting was top notch (even if they were playing irredeemable scumbags). This film also had a little humor added in to and a flashback with stop motion animation made this really feel like a Christmas movie. I almost hated this film when it came to the ending, but that final shot in the ending made it all worth it in saying "Yeah, we knew you would hate that ending and we were just playing with you". You better hope Santa is coming to your house instead of this guy because if you have this guy coming, it's because you haven't been good for goodness sakes.
13. The Good Dinosaur
I am sad to hear that this will be Pixar's first box office bomb as despite what critics and people I listen to say, I enjoyed this film a lot. Yeah, maybe you have seen the story kind of told in other places, but it is still a good story and the animation and scenery are beautiful. In fact, this is one of the first films you will see on this list where I was legit in tears in scenes because the interaction between the main character and his human "pet" were outstanding. Is this Pixar's best film? No....nor is it there best of the year as we'll see later, but it still is a great film and does not deserve the title of being Pixar's first box office bomb.
12. Wyrmwood: Road of the Dead
It definitely is Mad Max with zombies as the poster alludes to in that you deal with the zombies being the cause of the apocalypse. You get to see characters interact with actual humor over this entire situation and creative cars being made because of this as it seems the zombies breath and blood can be gasoline as they are flammable while real gasoline turns to water (just go with it). And of course the military are evil as hell since they are trying to help an evil scientist (who likes to listen to music while doing dastardly things) in his experiments with the zombies and with those whose blood type makes them immune to infection that spreads in the air. The gore and effects in here is top notch and the acting is great with actors you have probably never heard of. Zombies and the apocalypse maybe done to death, but this year definitely proved you could do unique things with them and they will be great.
11. Dope
What happens when a kid from the ghettos of Compton and is trying to get into Harvard finds that someone stuffed a "Molly" and a gun in his bag? Well, you a film with great comedy featuring geeky kids who are obsessed with the 90s trying to get rid of the stuff before they get busted and their lives are ruined forever. Using bitcoin, hacking skills, and their ways of being inconspicuous, they are able to get themselves out of this situation and the main kid even gets a love interest in Zoe Kravitz's character, who loves that he is smart and doesn't play down to the stereotype that most people in her neighborhood do. Oh and the editing of scenes is great as there are moments where you see characters you hadn't seen in a few minutes running and you are wondering what happened, then they show you what happened to cause this. This is a film that I would definitely recommend you watch, especially if you are tired of films in ghetto settings needing to have everyone act like they belong on the streets.
10. It Follows
This was the best horror movie of the year by a wide margin. The idea of a sexually transmitted curse is interesting and this deadly supernatural force that could be anyone walking towards you is completely unsettling. Great acting and a soundtrack that is great only compliment this film. I remember several times where I saw the creature walking towards our main character and I was just scared for the character. And if you wonder what happens to people that get caught by this creature, you see the consequences early as a woman who gets caught by it is found completely bent up like a pretzel. Oh and just because only the person who is cursed can see it, that doesn't mean it isn't there and is incorporeal so it is there and can hurt you, even if you aren't cursed with it. The ending is rather ambiguous as the main characters don't destroy the curse and can only just pass it along.
9. Predestination
This is the film I was talking about when I mentioned that the guidelines. I know this film was released in 2014 in most places, but in the US, it got it's real release in January 9, 2015 so yes, it counts as a 2015 film in my book. Ethan Hawke plays a character who has recovered from being hit by the Fiz Bomber, who he tried to stop and is now sent back in time to make sure that a character played by Sarah Snook meets the person who ruined her life. And I go any further or I would spoil things. The Spierig Brothers are one of those directing duels that I have seen make a better film than their last film and this is no exception. The idea of this sadly probably not getting any Oscar nods is truly insulting and proves what I have always believe that the Academy does not normally know what they are talking about when they present these awards.
8. Kingsman: The Secret Service
In February, this was my favorite film of the year so you can see what better films came up later on. This spy movie may do a lot of homage with the 007 film The Spy Who Loved Me, but it is still a great film. You get to see this young kid become a secret agent thanks to Colin Firth and Michael Caine. Samuel L. Jackson plays a perfect villain and he has a great crony in a woman who has blades for legs (and yes, she knows how to use them). The dialogue is stuff that I can quote and the actor playing the kid was actually really good and has a great future. Not much more I can say other than if you love spy films and would like something other than James Bond, this is a film to watch.
7. The Revenant
Leonardo DiCaprio needs to win the Oscar for this film (this coming from a guy who once called Leo the most overrated actor) and if he doesn't, then I don't know what Leo needs to do. In this film, he gets destroyed by everything from a bear, a cliff, Native Americans, and a villainous Tom Hardy, who plays a perfect cowardly villain who cares only about himself. This is also another film with Domhall Gleeson in it and the brutality in this film made me cringe at time (especially Leonardo's character having to close a wound on his neck). The only issue I kind of had was the bear was CGI although considering what the bear was doing, I can see why they needed to CGI it. Oh and points to the director of my favorite film last year being the director of this great film.
6. White God
Vengeance goes to the dog in this film that might be a film I can recommend any person from PETA or the ASPCA to watch as the people who are abusers to the dogs get messed up. This film (from Hungary) has you watching in sadness as this mixed breed dog gets treated like crap by a divorced father, a landlord, a homeless man, and dog fighting ring. Then you get to watch as most of those people get what they deserve at the hands of a group of abandoned dogs that this lead dog starts leading. You may have to deal with subtitles, but you most likely will love to see the daring effort this young director and "unknown to you" cast took to make this film really good that of course, wasn't nominated for an Academy Award (dumbass Academy). If you want to see this film, you can see it on Instant Queue if you have a Netflix account.
5. Straight Outta Compton
I remember first seeing this poster in a theater before seeing any trailer of any kind and thinking this was a documentary and then being sort of not happy when I found out it was a biographical drama instead. Well, thankfully this film was better than I ever could have expected it to be. Ice Cube's son plays his dad and looks completely like his dad. Jason Mitchell plays Eazy-E and he is just phenomenal. Of course, Paul Giamatti is also in this film and Corey Hawkins was good as Dr. Dre. The actor who played Suge Knight made sure to terrify me in every scene he was in with his looks and the moment Eazy-E's reaction to being told he has AIDS is the most believable reaction I have ever seen to someone who is told they have it (and that includes Matthew McConaughey in a role that won him an Oscar two years ago). I was in tears during that whole scenes from there to his death.
4. Inside Out
Who would have though a cartoon that deals with your feelings as individual characters during the one of the toughest time in childhood (which is moving to a new town) could be innovative and a definite gem. Well, if you have Pixar doing it and a cast that includes Amy Poehler, Bill Hader, Phyllis Smith, Mindy Kaling, and Lewis Black (who steals every scene he is in as Anger), you can get such a gem. This was another film that brought me to tears this year with something so innocent like forgetting something from your past. Also seeing feelings as characters in other people's bodies as well as great jokes make this film a must-see cartoon that can do things that you really won't see done well in a live action film.
3. Mad Max: Fury Road
This film has been on everyone's top ten list so you knew it was also in mine. Basically, Mad Max is captured by some cult lead by Immortan Joe who holds a place hostage by controlling the supply of water. Mad Max is made the blood bank of a war boy named Nux and somewhere, a one armed woman with a cyborg arm named Imperator Furiosa decides to free all the brides of Joe and escape with them on an armored truck in hopes of finding freedom for them. Mad Max escapes and catches up with them and you can go from there. Now this film has gotten criticized by a group of men who don't like that they believe Furiosa is made more of the star than Mad Max himself. Yeah...I don't care because it doesn't take away from the fact that this is an awesome and quotable film. My favorite moment of course is the guitar guy who is strapped to a truck full of amps and his guitar shoots fire.
2. The Peanuts Movie
Both Mad Max: Fury Road and Inside Out may be better movies, but The Peanuts Movie hit something of all the right buttons as far as nostalgia goes and this is a list of my favorite movies so yeah, this film is going to be higher and is probably going to something I am going to watch more than those two. Basically it is Charlie Brown trying to impress a new girl in school who he has a crush on while Snoopy is writing a fictional account of his fictional battle with the Red Baron in an attempt to save a female dog pilot named Fifi. This movie didn't need celebrities to play any of the characters (except Fifi, but then again Fifi talks like a female Snoopy which means no words). This film really made me have great memories of the Peanuts cartoons as despite Charlie Brown being a loser, he still has people be nice to him in the end. This is a great film for kids and when this comes out on DVD, I hope to get it.
And the #1 film is.....no surprises here.
1. Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Yes, a film that had been anticipated for months and months and when it finally came out, it was awesome. I have seen this movie twice now and may see a third time. Sure this film seems to have elements of the original trilogy in it, but that doesn't make it a bad film. Everyone in this movie plays this role perfectly and for Daisy Ridley (who plays Rey), her silver screen debut is going to be one of legends. Finn may be a black Stormtrooper (which some people were pissed at), but him being one is explained pretty easily and he definitely decides to get out of being on the evil side pretty quickly. Everyone from the original Star Wars returns and they all play important characters to the overall plot. Kylo Ren (the new Darth Vader) is made to be an emotional scumbag who I cant wait to see die for what he did and we got the great meme of TR-8R. I can't wait for the continuation of the story in two years and heck, I'll even watch the first spinoff movie that comes out next year. Star Wars all the way, baby.
And that is my list of favorite films of 2015. Next time, I'll talk about the films I hated the most in 2015 and boy did we have some doozies.
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