Sorry about it being late, but here is the show. Basically it was a short show since there wasn't much news. There were a few good matches, but they were at the end so the beginning of the show either sucked or was forgettable. I was nicer about the show than my co-host was, but yeah...we both believed in the end that it was okay.
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Sunday, August 31, 2014
Saturday, August 23, 2014
Monster Crap Inductee: Alien Files (aka Sex Files: Alien Erotica) (1998)
Monster Crap
Inductee: Alien Files (aka Sex Files: Alien Erotica)
Because Space Fungus Also Need Loving Too
Alain is a very well-known producer of softcore
porn, just like Zalman King. Alain’s biggest accomplishment is being a producer
of the Emmanuelle films, which is based on a character created by Emmanuelle
Arsan in the 1959 novel Emmanuelle. The originally started out as a series of
French soft-core films and luck would have it, made its way into the United
States with spinoffs like Emmanuelle In Space, Emmanuelle 2000, Emmanuelle
Private Collections, & Emmanuelle Through Time. There is also a US TV film
called Emmanuelle. Basically all the films and TV episodes in canon with the
character from the books are owned by Alain Siritzky.
Anne is played by the attractive Gabriella Hall, who I have seen in such
shows and films as 3 episodes of Erotic Confessions, two episodes of Intimate
Sessions, 11 episodes of Beverly Hills Bordello (she was the second Mary
Winston, the lead character of the show), The Exotic Time Machine, 1 episode of
The Pleasure Zone, Ilicit Lovers, Alien Erotica II, Lawful Entry…
Anne is about to go on watch,
but gets grilled and teased by Lou Benson and Karen Gilmore about her having
sex with machines.
Laura Palmer, also known as Petra Sexton thanks to her marriage to
Charlie Sexton. She is well known for being a porn star of the 90s and her most
known stuff is The Perils of Ms. Parker, Stripper Wives, and the Erotic House
of Wax.
The full crew is on screen as
we then meet Dr. Claire Danning.
That is Delphine Pacific, who while I am not attracted to her much, I
can’t make too much of a fuss since apparently by the time this film premiered,
she was 40 years old. IMDB really has her only 12 credits as an actress, but as
you will see later, IMDB really isn’t great with casts of porn films.
After this all ends, the real
Dr. Danning and Russ both pass out, Claire telling Anne to stop the fungus that
is acting like a doppelganger. Then it is Karen’s turn to get molested in the
weight room by the doppelganger.
And after the deed is complete
and Karen is finished, the doppelganger turns into Karen.
As Anne looks for the
doppelganger with the gun, she finds Karen who is passed out. Meanwhile, the
doppelganger is having sex with Lou.
Like telepathy, Karen feels the
sex going through her body and tries to rape Anne, before just going into
masturbation. The doppelganger causes Lou to pass out as Anne continues
searching for it with a ray gun.
She runs into the doppelganger
in Karen form. When asked about Lou, the doppelganger says that Lou is resting
for the moment, but when he wakes up, he’ll be ready to go again if Anne is
interested. Anne goes for the gun, but the doppelganger has it and is wondering
what she is doing with it. The doppelganger then gives Anne a whiff of the
perfume and Anne has a fantasy about getting fucked by machine wires.
That is where we see the story
end, but Anne continues to say that she fought the doppelganger, opened the air
duct, and forced it into outer space. Of course, she was able to close it
before she herself went to outer space and that’s the end of the story,
believing that the scent is what is causing her issues as well as all the
others However, Preston has issues with that ending because he believes he has
heard it before (PS…that was how Ripley defeated her foe in the 1979
Sci-Fi/Horror classic Alien). Another guard comes in and says that while
cleaning up the ship, they found something and he would like them to check it
out immediately. So they all leave the interrogation room guarded by two female
officers.
Ah, those two female guards are played by Lauren Hays (the
brunette/redhead whose name on the credits is Nancy) and Blake Pickett (aka
Emma Joones) (who plays the blonde named Kelly Connor. You can kind of guess
which one gets the bigger role as one has a full name and the other doesn’t.
Lauren Hays is a very attractive lass who I have seen in plenty of films and shows like an episode of Beverly Hills Bordello, Life of a Gigolo, Club Wild Side, Temptations, all 13 episodes of Thrills (she was the star of that show), all 13 episodes of the first season of Hotel Erotica (she was the star of that show as well), and Perfectly Legal.
They all then realize that the Anne they have been talking to was actually the alien doppelganger so they rush back to interrogation. But when they get there, Nancy says that her partner went to check on the prisoner and then left to get an aspirin. The agents enter the room and it is the real Kelly nude on the table. Nancy tries to say that is impossible as she saw her walk out, but Preston confirms that she saw the doppelganger alien instead and they don’t think she plans on coming back. Col. Parks goes on the speakers and asks all people to lock the gates as he also sounds the alarm.
After the sex and the guard
passing out, the doppelganger steals the keys and car and opens the gate,
making an escape before the agents can apprehend her. Forrest wonders how they
are going to able to catch the doppelganger, but Preston says that while she
stays in that form, they believe they still have a link which is Kelly. Back in
the interrogation room, Forrest wonders how any of what they heard was true and
Preston says that until the part about the air lock, everything adds up.
Preston then thinks that the earlier sex with the male guard was just to throw
them off the scent so they could put two female guards there and she could then
make her escape.
The doppelganger looks at her
new body and decides that she must have sex with Will. And she does, almost
causing Will to pass out because of over-sexing (because he is tired and she
still wants to go). However, the psychic link still somewhat works as the
doppelganger senses them coming so she makes a getaway…stealing Will’s car
after trying to get back in the car she came in, but due to the different form,
the gas attendant refuses to let her drive away.
That is Shayna Ryan, who was in films and shows like Pleasurecraft, an
episode of the Pleasure Zone, Bikini Hoe Down, and Stripper Wives.
Preston is not happy about not
being told about Adam, but Parks says that he wasn’t too sure about all of this
and only had suspicions and the agents just confirmed them. Of course the
argument is halted by Agent Forrest moaning and starting to feel what the
doppelganger is feeling. Parks wants to wake up, but Preston says to just allow
her to have her wet dream so the Colonel decides that he is just going to wait
by the window until it is done. Suddenly in the kitchen, the bus boy shows up
and the doppelganger decides that she wants to have sex with him.
So the bus boy from earlier goes to deliver coffee to the Colonel and low and behold, he recognizes the real Agent Forrest as the doppelganger and he freaks out. He tries to run away, but they eventually catch up to him. He then reveals that she sexually assaulted him and the cook is in the hospital after suffering a heart attack. So yes, now you know that this alien female doppelganger changes form when touching women and fucks men until they suffer from exhaustion. And you have to give credit to this actor who is playing the bus boy here, he does act like someone who was just raped by a woman and it is rare and refreshing to see that, especially with most of the media portraying rape as a thing that only happens to women or to guys by other guys.
Preston then jokes about how this makes the decision quite easy and thus they are all on a helicopter and yeah, Agent Forrest is getting horny so Preston decides to ask her to try and use that psychic link. Of course this does help then realize that the doppelganger is on a Mule’s trail, which all are on the south rim of the canyon heading to the river. He tells the pilot to head there and the pilot reveals there will be some turbulence. Oh boy, you know what that means.
Ah Kim Yates…
Preston goes through the plants and Forrest follows, finding out the plants barely block a secret part of the cavern that is filled with plants and a secret pond.
The two agents smell the aroma and they know that they are in the spot where the two aliens will meet. Of course they immediately run into Adam, who is not too happy to see them.
Adam controls the plants to grab and bind the two agents to the wall.
Also as a present from Eve, she commands the plants to pleasure Agent Forrest.
Yep, Forrest is sort of getting tree raped.
And the fungus flies into space.
The two agents are released and Agent Forrest is disappointed that the tree molestation has stopped. Agent Forrest then asks how they are going to explain this one and Agent Preston says they aren’t. He says if Col. Parks and everyone else may have questions, they can just read the file. Forrest agrees with that idea and then she says let’s get out of here. Agent Preston then says that the fastest way back is with the chopper and Agent Forrest says she knows with a smile, confirming that she will be staying on as an agent for this division that deals with sexual phenomena. After a few minutes in space, we get the file called The Eden Project, which is placed back into the files, and that is locked into a vault that says Sex Files.
Because Space Fungus Also Need Loving Too
1998
Space
fungus…in need of some love. SPACE FUNGUS…IN NEED OF SOME LOVE!!! Should I
really say anything more?
You’re Damn Right You Need To Say More Than That.
This Is An Induction, Not Your Twitter Feed
*Sigh*
Alright, as some of you know from the last induction, the guy who had a
screenplay credit for The Killer Eye directed this film. Yeah, Rolfe Kanefsky
has had humble beginnings in the world of porn and if you are wondering why I
say humble beginnings, you’ll find out when I talk about this film’s aftermath.
Now
surprisingly this film is actually one of the many films in the Sex Files
series, which is basically a series of films meant to be porn spoofs of the hot
show in the 90s, The X Files. Other films in this series are: Digital Sex,
Sexually Bewitched, Ancient Desires, Pleasure World, Pleasureville, Portrait of
the Souls, Restless Souls, Sexual Matrix, Alien Erotica II (yeah, there was a
sequel to this film), and plenty of others. What they all have in common
besides some of the actors appearing in several of these, is the producer Alain
Siritzky.
But that’s not
to say Alain didn’t do other series besides the Emmanuelle stuff, he also has
produced the Justine series, the Passion & Romance series, the Scandal
series, as well as films not connected by any series, I think. So yeah, we are
basically going into the big times as far as the softcore film industry goes.
Yes, we got all that. Thank you
creepy owl from Legend of Zelda: Ocarina Of Time. I think we can Well, now that
we have that out of the way, let’s get into this film.
We first get a info about what
we are about to see or hear is highly classified since it is some of the most
guarded and highly unusual sexual known or rather unknown to man. We are also
about to greater than good and more addictive than desire. These are of course
in a series reports known as…
Originally Sex Files Was What
It Was Going To Be Said, But You Know…They Had To Change The Title Because
Alternate Titles And All
We then get an X-Files like
montage (with even X-Files ripoff music) of all the stuff that happens in these
series of films that I can’t show you because most of them involve having sex. By
the way, in the original version, after the montage ended, there was a title
that said Alien Erotica, but that was removed as well and replaced with….
Why The Title Of The Film
Again…..For No Reason Whatsoever. Oh And Also We Are At An Exterior Government
Compound, Which Has An Unknown Location.
Apparently there was a ship of
astronauts that went into space with five crew members, then they lost contact
with them, then they came back and four were forced to go into the infirmary
while the one is in the interview room.
We Then Meet Agent Preston,
Agent Forrest, & Col. Parks
Ah Kira Reed (The woman in the middle for those of you who have to ask).
She was my second porn star crush and she lasted for quite a while as a crush
of mine. I’ve seen her in films and shows like an episode of Thrills, an
episode of Beverly Hills Bordello, an episode of Re Shoe Diaries, two episodes
of Erotic Confessions, Losing Control, an episode of Nightcap, Surrender, Alien
Erotica II, Sexual Intrigue, House of Love, The Mistress Club, an episode of
Thrills….
We get it, you’ve seen her in a
lot of films. But what I am more interested in is the voice of Col. Parks. I
have heard it before...
Oh God!!! It’s Sheriff Rocker
from Zarkorr: The Invader!!
No, No, NO, I Will Not Have
Zarkorr Causing Havoc With My Sanity Here.
Also, he is a voice actor and appeared in a Hentai known as Mezzo Forte.
Goddamn you, Pete. Moving back
to the film, Agent Forrest seems to take everything way to seriously and is no
amused to be the partner of Agent Preston, who is kind of womanizing and makes
jokes at times. We also learn that the one not in the infirmary is Anne Gallo,
who was the computer analyst of the crew. Col. Parks says that he knows Anne
personally and she must be sick because she would never act the way she has
been acting lately. There has been a security breach in the place where Anne is
being held and they go down to find out that Officer Dunne went in to check on
her, locked the door, and hasn’t come out. So since this was an interrogation
room, there is a two way mirror where they can see what is going on and…
Let’s Just Say That They All
See That Anne Is Having Sex With Dunne. They Are Both Naked And Her Breasts Are
In Plain View.
Agent Forrest leaves the room
and Preston explains that she seems to be a little uptight when it comes to sex
right now and they will eventually break her in. Yep…Agent Forrest is uptight
about sex and yet she is on a team in the Feds that deals with sexually related
phenomena. Who the fuck hired her for this job?
Hey, She Has A Nice Rack
Ugh…..moving on. Col. Parks
says Anne was never like this, well not with him anyway.
Spoken Like A Guy Who Wished
Anne Had Sex With Him
After several minutes of them
having sex, security finally is able to break the two up and thankfully for
this induction, finally get some clothes on Anne.
Obviously, you have seen her in
a lot of stuff. Anyway, Anne then explains to Preston, Forrest, and Parks about
what happened on the ship. The crew was returning from the Nebulus System.
The alarm sounds and we get to
see Lt. Russ Allen to tell everyone to not panic as some debris is floating by
the ship.
We then find out that it is
some form of floating fungus.
Guilala Better Not Be In That
Fungus.
Dr. Danning wants to get a
piece of the fungus for research and gets a piece of it with the ship’s metal
arm. Danning thanks Russ for his consent, but she accidentally calls him Russ
instead of “Lieutenant” which means they do have some personal bond. Anne goes
to run a system’s check and of course, Russ looks at her ass as she leaves. Lou
tells them that it is too bad that they only hire “Asexual” females on this
trip. Lou, just because straight women on this trip would prefer not to have sex
in space doesn’t mean they are Asexual. Besides, let’s not talk about Asexual
anything because otherwise, you are making me have 1998 Godzilla flashbacks.
Which By The Way, I Did Enjoy
The Crew Of Rifftrax Making Fun Of This Month
Anyway, Lou then mentions that
since Karen is a lesbian, she is just as sexually frustrated as they are. Then
Karen comes up to them and says that she doesn’t think that is possible. They
of course don’t report the fungus because it seems trivial at this time. Dr.
Danning starts inspects the fungus and finds that it is non-toxic and has no
radiation so of course, Claire Danning removes her face mask.
Because I Guess To Her, Poison
Or Radioactivity Are The Only Two Reasons To Have A Freaking Facemask on. It’s
Not Like It’s A Fungus Or Anything And It Can Produce Pollen and Other
Stuff……Oh Wait!!!
She even sees the fungus
emitting some sort of powder as it seems to be trying to pollenate and still
thinks nothing can go wrong here. She gets exactly what she deserves as when
she inspects it with tweezers, she gets a face full of powder.
Congrats On That Darwin Award,
Doctor…You More Than Deserve It.
She starts coughing it up and
then for some reason, she starts getting aroused.
I Think It Is Safe To Assume
That You All Know That She Is Going To Go Masturbate.
And She Is Going To Be Using
That Secretion.
So After several minutes of
masturbation time, something comes out of her. And That Being is now a
doppelganger of Dr. Danning. While controlling the ship, Anne has a
conversation with Lt. Allen. Anne reports that Lou is still flirting with every
female member and the same can be said for Karen. Russ asks about her and Anne
says that she came here to do a job and that is exactly what she is doing. Russ
tries to get her to join him on his break, but Anne says that she will be more
than happy to take a break with him….after the mission is over in two days.
Russ laughs and says that he can wait that long and says that if the ladies can
show self-control, so can the men in this crew. Anne then says to take a lesson
from Dr. Danning, who shows up asking about why her name was mentioned. Claire
has something she would like to discuss with Russ privately and Anne then
leaves. You can kind of guess where this is going after he smells her “new
perfume”.
Yep…..They Have Sex, Although
It Looks Like She Has Transformed At Times Into Anne (Because Obviously, Russ
Wants To Have Sex With Anne).
While they are having sex, Anne
goes to the lab and finds Dr. Danning trying to molest her.
Nope, Not Making Any Of That
Up. Apparently The Teases Of Anne Wanting To Have Sex With Machines Earlier
Were True.
Now the doppelganger wants to
have sex with Anne, but Anne is fighting it. A chase ensues and then Karen
comes after her.
Lauren Hays is a very attractive lass who I have seen in plenty of films and shows like an episode of Beverly Hills Bordello, Life of a Gigolo, Club Wild Side, Temptations, all 13 episodes of Thrills (she was the star of that show), all 13 episodes of the first season of Hotel Erotica (she was the star of that show as well), and Perfectly Legal.
Blake Pickett was the bigger star at the time and
who has been in such films as The Exotic Time Machine, Sexecutioner (another
Sex Files film), and Confessions of a Lap Dancer. She is also very attractive,
but in my mind not as attractive as Lauren Hayes. I guess I’m probably the
least attracted to blondes for some reason even though some of my porn crushes
have been blondes.
Moving on, after they leave,
Anne calls for a glass of water from one of the guards, which is Kelly. Of
course she as she hands her the glass of water, Anne grabs her arm and as you
guessed it, the Anne we have been seeing was the doppelganger the whole time.
What A Twist!
Col. Parks and the two agents
go to the infirmary and find that the thing they found on the ship was the real
Anne Gallo, who is having a telepathic orgasm.
They all then realize that the Anne they have been talking to was actually the alien doppelganger so they rush back to interrogation. But when they get there, Nancy says that her partner went to check on the prisoner and then left to get an aspirin. The agents enter the room and it is the real Kelly nude on the table. Nancy tries to say that is impossible as she saw her walk out, but Preston confirms that she saw the doppelganger alien instead and they don’t think she plans on coming back. Col. Parks goes on the speakers and asks all people to lock the gates as he also sounds the alarm.
Unfortunately as you can guess,
the doppelganger already is having sex with a male guard in the parking lot.
Col. Parks asks if he believes
that this doppelganger can’t take the form of the man and Preston says it
hasn’t thus far and man has a different genetic composition than a woman and
since it first bound with a female, his guess is that it is stuck in that form.
Forrest then makes a sarcastic remark of great because now they only have to
keep an eye out for half the population. Preston then asks Kelly what happened
and Kelly tells the story of how she couldn’t control herself due to the aroma
and got an orgasm by the doppelganger. Forrest has a hard time buying any of
this and Preston says her seeing the way things are is why she is here. Preston
then says that with Kelly’s help, they believe they can catch this. So the two
agents take Kelly with them and they head out of the compound on the road to
search for the creature. Meanwhile, the doppelganger makes a stop at a gas
station and pays the attendant to fill her car up.
While in the car, Preston has
an idea of having Kelly try and masturbate to get a psychic link with the
doppelganger in an attempt to find her location, much to the chagrin of
Forrest, who is repulsed by all of this. This of course despite the fact that
Agent Forrest herself joked about needing a sexual arousal to have a psychic
link. Forrest then asks Preston to remind her to transfer out of this division
when this case is finished. Meanwhile I am wondering how she transferred into
this division in the first place since she had no idea this division was about
sexual phenomena. You would think her former boss would inform her about the
division she is transferring to and the fact that they deal with sexual stuff
would come up.
Of course this theory works as
the doppelganger feels it and they realize she is at a Schellco gas station.
And You Thought I Was
Misspelling Shelco Here. No, As Porno Pete Has Told Me, Porn Flicks Like To
Spell Or Straight Up Change The Name Of A Real Place As A Sort Of Parody.
But because of all of this
arousal stuff, the doppelganger now feels the “need to feed”. Fortunately for
her, a young couple named Will & Monique pulls up and wants to have sex in
the bathroom.
That woman playing Monique is Ravanelle Richardson, who I sadly know not
much about and this is where even IMDB fails since she is not even credited by
them as being in this film even though the actual film credits say otherwise.
The only thing they have her in is another one of the Sex Files films called Restless
Souls.
They two start having sex and
the doppelganger masturbates in the other stall. This of course the real Kelly
feels and says she might be about to change bodies. Then the Kelly doppelganger
knocks out Will and as Monique is about to go for help, she is grabbed by the
doppelganger and is molested in the other stall. Of course now that the
doppelganger has taken the form of Monique, Kelly feels nothing now which means
the psychic link has ended and the agents rush to the gas station.
Of course Will comes out and
sees the doppelganger driving away in his car and tries to chase after it,
thinking Monique just stole his car. He tells the agents that his girlfriend
stole his car and when asked if he can identify her, Will says of he can
because it is his girlfriend. So they drop off Kelly to her car and pick up
Will to chase after the doppelganger. Meanwhile the real Monique comes out of
the bathroom and asks the gas station attendant and Kelly if she has seen Will
or the car.
Wah Wah Wahhhhhh
While in the van with the agents,
Will can’t believe that she goes nuts on him and then she steals his car.
Preston asks if he was sexually assaulted and Will says it almost felt that way
as she was like a wild animal. Then Forrest has to make the snide comment about
it being more like a wild vegetable. She then thinks backup will help, but
Preston says no because we need to keep a low profile…..and then goes speeding.
Low profile, my ass.
I’m Sure You Will Still Keep A
Low Profile When The Cops Pull Your Ass Over For Reckless Driving
Will even mentions as they go
off road to pass some trucks that Preston is going to get them killed, to which
Preston responds that he should not worry because they are insured. Yeah, I’m
sure it will be very nice of that insurance to insure you after you’re dead.
Then Will finally decides to put his seatbelt on. I would make a Click It Or
Ticket joke, but I’m he’s a passenger in the backseat and we never see them
give tickets in those commercials for that.
The car chase brings them to nightfall
and we see Will and Agent Forrest play Go Fish while Preston is still driving.
Man, I Want To Play Go Fish
Too. Stupid Car That I Have To Manually Drive. I Wish I Was In A Taxi.
The chase finally ends at a
strip club, where Monique enters. The agents enter as well and they tell Will
to watch the door and make sure she doesn’t escape. Of course Forrest makes
another remark asking why she doesn’t think that the doppelganger will be the
only female inside. Forrest, that is mostly anywhere where the doppelganger
won’t be the only female inside.
Well, You’re Right About The
Doppelganger Not Being The Only Female Inside, But Since This Is A Strip
Club…That Would Be Rather Weird If She Was The Only Female Inside.
By the way, that stripper is played by Avalon Anders who was in seven
episodes of the Showtime softcore porn series Hot Springs Hotel, an episode of
Red Shoe Diaries, an episode of Beverly Hills Bordello as well as other films.
Yeah, this is basically a cameo for her.
Preston checks in the several
rooms that are for lap dances only and runs into a girl in a bikini who is
wondering what the fuck he is doing in this area.
After that small distraction,
the doppelganger attacks Preston and beats him up. Forrest tries to stop her,
but the doppelganger runs into her and they both fall over. While on the
ground, the doppelganger decides that it is changing time.
With A Face That Looks Like She
Is Ready To Swallow My Soul
But yeah, the doppelganger
turns into Agent Forrest.
Enjoyed Playing With Ya,
Hone…..But I Gotta Go.
The doppelganger runs out of
the strip club past Will, who thinks it is the actual agent before she and
Preston show up to confirm that they let the doppelganger escape.
Yeah, I Would Have That Look Of
Befuddlement Too
The doppelganger escapes by
hitching a ride on a fire truck and this is where the agents and Will part
ways. But before they leave, Will says that if they see his girlfriend, to tell
her that he is breaking up with her. Forrest also confirms that she is now the
psychic link to the doppelganger.
The agents decide to rent out a
room at a motel. Forrest thinks they should still be out looking for it, but
Preston says it won’t go very far since it is linked to her and exhaustion
doesn’t help the investigation. Forrest wants to know what that aroma was
because it made her dizzy and while she wanted to fight it, she couldn’t.
Preston first jokes that it is repressed lesbian tendencies before really
saying that pollen as we know it are powder like sex cells that are found on
flower stems so if this pollen is laced with pheromones, it could easily have a
physical effect on people, making their bodies react on their own, like the
same scent a female dog gives off when she is in heat. Forrest then says that I
guess we will all start howling at the moon.
Or Sing That Stupid Song That
For Some Reason You Can’t Get Out Of Your Head And Oh Dear God…It’s Happening
Again. Damn You Stephen Parsons & Babel For Making That Song.
Forrest then falls over and
says it is like her whole body just fell asleep, which Parsons takes to mean
that the doppelganger is going to sleep now so he helps her to bed. She wants
to stay awake, but Preston refuses and asks Forrest to try something. Forrest
refuses on the whole masturbating thing, but that isn’t what Preston wants. He
instead wants her to sleep and if she does that, she may get into the
subconscious of the doppelganger. She thinks that because it is an alien, she
doesn’t even know if they dream, but Preston says that it is an alien inside a
human body so it has to abide by our rules.
The Blair Monster From John
Carpenter’s The Thing Wonders When The Hell Did It Have To Follow Human Rules.
Forrest closes her eyes and
eventually sees dreams inside the creature.
Which Is Sleeping On An
Alleyway And Oh Dear God…The Terrible Things That Could Happen To A Woman That
Attractive On An Alleyway.
Okay, back to the dreams. We
see that the doppelganger is dreaming about meeting someone named Adam.
She Better Be Careful Freddy
Kruger Doesn’t Show Up.
Not That Freddy Kruger
That Freddy Kruger
Anyway, the doppelganger in
Karen’s body (she likes that body the best so far is the reason) and the two
have sex. Of course, Agent Forrest in that dream world gets caught and has to
wake up before it turns into a nightmare. She confirms all that she saw, adding
that there is already a male doppelganger here and adds that she thinks the
aliens know that they know. Preston then calls Col. Parks to get here
immediately.
The next day, the doppelganger
wakes up and the first thing on her mind is food. Meanwhile Col. Parks shows up
and talks to Preston while Forrest is still sleeping. Preston reveals that
Forrest is psychically linked with the doppelganger. Preston also reveals that
she saw that there is another alien doppelganger here named Adam. Col. Parks then
reveals that there was a former astronaut who was in that same area during his
flight four years ago named Adam and he supposes that the two are going to want
an explanation.
Meanwhile in the kitchen of the
diner, a cook gets ready to cook up breakfast while a bus boy takes the trash
outside. The cook tells the bus boy to get busy cleaning up those tables as it
will be busy here in twenty minutes. The alien doppelganger shows up and you
can kind of guess the cook and her are about to have sex.
Yep….It Is His Turn.
Eventually Agent Forrest in the
motel finishes her wet dream and wakes up with Preston say “Morning”. At the
diner, Col. Parks reveals that they had sent a team to that region before and
everything seemed fine when they came back, except for all the women wanting to
have sex with Commander Adam Lewiston. Afterwards, Adam quit NASA, divorced his
wife, and disappeared into the wilderness to become a hermit. He says that it is
obvious that the same commander who went on that mission was not the same one
that came back. Preston’s guess is that the male version of the species kills
the original because it doesn’t like that psychic link stuff happening. They
surmise that the female doppelganger was the male’s mate and now she is looking
for him to have a reunion. Col. Parks does not want this to happen since the
male one killed one of his astronauts and spreads a dangerous sex violence in
their wake.
So the bus boy from earlier goes to deliver coffee to the Colonel and low and behold, he recognizes the real Agent Forrest as the doppelganger and he freaks out. He tries to run away, but they eventually catch up to him. He then reveals that she sexually assaulted him and the cook is in the hospital after suffering a heart attack. So yes, now you know that this alien female doppelganger changes form when touching women and fucks men until they suffer from exhaustion. And you have to give credit to this actor who is playing the bus boy here, he does act like someone who was just raped by a woman and it is rare and refreshing to see that, especially with most of the media portraying rape as a thing that only happens to women or to guys by other guys.
Yeah, now that I am off my
soapbox, back to the film. He also reveals that she would have done the same
thing to him as she did the cook if a person named Marco had not come in and
scared her off. When asked if she said anything to him before he left, the bus
boy said she did and that it was like “Today is going to be a grand day”. With
that and the fact that they are in Arizona, they surmise that it can only mean
one thing and that is the doppelganger is heading to the Grand Canyon.
So they head to the Grand
Canyon and since this whole area is too much ground to carry on foot, they get
a helicopter. Agent Forrest does not like this idea because being up in the air
for some reason gets her horny.
Ah, So Agent Forrest Must Be
Related To Donna Stratton from 1941.
Preston then jokes about how this makes the decision quite easy and thus they are all on a helicopter and yeah, Agent Forrest is getting horny so Preston decides to ask her to try and use that psychic link. Of course this does help then realize that the doppelganger is on a Mule’s trail, which all are on the south rim of the canyon heading to the river. He tells the pilot to head there and the pilot reveals there will be some turbulence. Oh boy, you know what that means.
Yep…She Tries To Have Sex With
Preston, With Preston Trying To Stop Her As She Isn’t Herself.
Careful Agent Forrest, that
would make you in the eyes of the law a serial rapist and even though we all
know as a viewing audience that the first one was an actual doppelganger, I
have a sneaking suspicion that no one in this world would believe that story.
Forrest then sees that the
doppelganger is going after a woman who we only see the back of.
Yep….It’s Time For The Alien To
Switch Forms
So because of that, Forrest
loses the psychic link to the alien, but not before finding out that the change
happened at the Bright Angel Trail, which leads river near all those
underground caves so they head there.
So we see the doppelganger lead
two men into a cave and we also find out that her name is Eve.
Ah Kim Yates…
Um, her name in the credits
says Kris Tyler, you sure you aren’t confusing her with someone else.
Not with that body and face I am not. That is most certainly Kim Yates. I
guess she went under a Kris Tyler for this film, which I do not know why. But
anyway…I have seen her in plenty of stuff like Striking Resemblance, 5 episodes
of Erotic Confessions, 2 episodes of Beverly Hills Borello, an episode of the
Pleasure Zone, 9 episodes of NightCap (where she was one of the three main
characters on the show), The Model Solution, and Sexual Pleasures.
Okay…if you have seen her that
much, then I guess you could recognize her. Anyway, you can kind of guess that
she has sex with the two guys, although we do not see it.
The helicopter sets down at
Flatstone, which is at the mouth of the cavern. Since Preston believes that it
may be a trap, he suggests they let him and Forrest go this one alone. Parks
agrees, but he says that they have to radio in everything they see.
We cut to the two agents in the
caverns and finding the two guys passed out so they surmise that they are on
the right path. Forrest is nervous and Preston tries to say that they are only
fungus from another planet, which Forrest retorts that she saw all three
versions of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Well, since this was 1998 and at
the time, there were only three, I will forgive her for not mentioning the 2007
remake called The Invasion.
Although I Am Less Forgetful
That That Film Even Exists And I Can Easily Say That It Is The Worst Invasion
Of The Body Snatchers Film.
Preston says think about
something else like what if an earthquake were to occur right now. Well, there
isn’t much thought to that, you would be dead and your body would probably take
days to find if at all, meaning that your body would rot in these caves. So
yeah, already thought out….got anything else you want Forrest to think about
other than Invasion of the Body Snatchers and how this film could closely
relate to that situation.
Surprisingly, they find plants.
Preston goes through the plants and Forrest follows, finding out the plants barely block a secret part of the cavern that is filled with plants and a secret pond.
The two agents smell the aroma and they know that they are in the spot where the two aliens will meet. Of course they immediately run into Adam, who is not too happy to see them.
Adam controls the plants to grab and bind the two agents to the wall.
Eve comes in completely nude
and of course I can’t show you much. Adam reveals that while yes, he did kill
the original Adam, it was only because the original tried to kill him and it
was in self-defense. He says that the two of them will be joining together and
will leave this planet together. Adam finally says that they are just here to
witness their departure so they can tell their heads that they no longer have
to worry about them being on this planet. All of this revelation spoken very
stiltedly, which I guess was the point, but still very badly delivered. Of
course, the agents ask why they should believe him, which Adam responds that
they should believe him because he hasn’t killed the agents yet, which he so
would if he wanted to. When asked about the sex virus, Adam says that when he
and Eve depart, the sex virus will leave with them and they only hope that one
day they will find their true home again.
So Adam and Eve (yeah, you know
exactly what they did there with their names) start to have dirty, slimy sex
Also as a present from Eve, she commands the plants to pleasure Agent Forrest.
Yep, Forrest is sort of getting tree raped.
Are We Sure The Necronomicon
From Evil Dead Isn’t Down There As Well?
And after all the sex, they
disappear into a blinding light.
And the fungus flies into space.
The two agents are released and Agent Forrest is disappointed that the tree molestation has stopped. Agent Forrest then asks how they are going to explain this one and Agent Preston says they aren’t. He says if Col. Parks and everyone else may have questions, they can just read the file. Forrest agrees with that idea and then she says let’s get out of here. Agent Preston then says that the fastest way back is with the chopper and Agent Forrest says she knows with a smile, confirming that she will be staying on as an agent for this division that deals with sexual phenomena. After a few minutes in space, we get the file called The Eden Project, which is placed back into the files, and that is locked into a vault that says Sex Files.
And thus the film ends
Well, this film was liked
enough that a sequel was made of this film and in that sequel, several of the
cast from the first one returned, some in the same roles and some in other
roles. Kira Reed (who played Agent Forrest) divorced her then-husband Daniel Anderson
and later on married awards show producer Robert Lorsch. William Knight (who
played Col. Parks) does a lot of voice acting these days and if he seems to be
in every anime that is well known. Blake Pickett (who played Kelly) now works
as a photographer in Venice, Italy. Lauren Hays (who played Nancy) did more
porn, was married to porn producer Gary Dean Orona until 2006 when they
divorced, and then married to Last Chance Highway star/producer Lucas Hoge
(which she also co-produces). Rolfe Kanefsky (who wrote and directed this film)
still dabbles in a little softcore porn here or there (namely the Emmanuelle
Through Times series), but has seem to rather do low budget schlock films
instead and would rather write than direct.
My thoughts are of this film is
it is actually okay. The acting at times is good and at times it is bad, but I
did like the effects. Also, for those of you who were upset that there wasn’t
much porn in The Killer Eye other than a monster molesting women, well….this
should be more your cup of tea. And unlike the first two films I did for the
Summer of Porno Pete, this is not boring and it knew when it could get away
with a sex scene and make it not just be completely pointless.
So that was that film and now
Pete, you only have one more film that I will review so you better make it
count.
Oh I do plan to make it count because I am going to an Italian director
for my final film and that director is one Jesus Franco, or Jess Franco as most
of you know him. Yes, he has also dabbled into the porn genre, but this is the
90s Jess Franco so you probably won’t be getting much exploitation gore and
that film is…
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